… A FAILURE TO COMMUNICATE!

That’s right! A recurring chapter in my soon-to-be-possibly-published-if-I-win-Lotto journey through the Queensland justice system is this one… Chapter ##: A failure to communicate #4

By my very poor Aspley State School understanding of arithmetic, today, Friday 14 August 2026 marks 76 days since QTranscripts would have received – even by snail mail – my request that they check the transcript of my Magistrates Court traffic charge hearing back in May 2025, based on my claim that a crucial section – dialogue between the SM and the police prosecutor – was missing.

That letter and a subsequent follow-up request several months later have never been responded to. Or if they have, they went to the wrong address or someone’s been stealing junk and other mail out of my letterbox. Fuck I hate trying to be fair!

So why is today so important? On Tuesday, I sent them by express post what Pauline Hanson would probably call a rather terse “please explain!” letter, telling them that I’ll take all sorts of action if I don’t get a written response by next Monday’s regular Australia Post service. This included a threat to hold my breath and stamp my feet until I was treated fairly and squarely in this matter. Okay, not that. I’ll try other means of recourse once I think up some.

So I’m eagerly awaiting what might appear in my letterbox either today or Monday. But more than that, I’ve set myself a test as someone who has never, ever, won a Walkley award for investigative journalism, by sealing in an envelope, mid-morning today, my tips for what any reply will contain.

Either around midday today (or Monday) I’ll open that envelope under independent scrutiny, including the supervision of Treasury officials who these days have nothing to do since Gold Lotto draws disappeared from the telly, to make sure everything is hunky dory and it’s the perfect chance to finally evaluate how astute a newshound I turned out to be after all these decades.

What will match my sealed prediction: No reply – 41 percent; Your review request is being assessed now and we thank you for your patience – 32 per cent; We are currently seeking legal advice as to whether it is right and proper for this transcription service to accede to your request – 20 per cent; We looked into this the very day the District Court registry forwarded your misdirected request to us two weeks before May 28 and the transcript is absolutely correct – 7 per cent; We waited until your own formal request reached us – which we think was only fair – and, yes, we did put a silver bullet on that given the seriousness of your claims and found, yes, that a crucial piece of dialogue was missing from the transcript and surely you got our missive about that because we appreciated at the time it might have influenced the District Court appeal judge’s considerations – 0 per cent.

Like you, I hope you can’t wait to see if one of those responses is spot on or just added proof as to why a Walkley has never graced a mantelpiece I would have happily built and bugger the cost if had I ever won one!

Don Gordon-Brown
The Bug‘s lifetime-appointed court reporter and ranter-in-residence

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