WASHINGTON DC: The White House has refuted suggestions that President Trump’s mental faculties are deteriorating following his decision to formally rename the entire USA.

The White House statement followed an appearance by the President at a Make America Great Again (MAGA) rally soon after his announcement that he had renamed Lake Ontario as Lake America as part of his ongoing trade war with Canada.

A totally naked President Trump delivered a rambling four-hour woven speech to the rally in the also just-renamed Tennessee capital of Trumpville, formerly Nashville, during which he boasted about his decision to rename the border lake. (main picture)

“Those people living in our 51st state [sic] must learn that as Americans they need to have American names for all geographic features across what is at the moment called Canada but which I will also soon be renaming as North Trump,” he said to wild cheers and chants of “USA!, USA!, USA!” from the MAGA crowd.

“America is the greatest country on earth,” he added as the crowd again erupted into sustained chants of “USA!, USA!, USA!”. Many of those present squeezed off prolonged bursts of fire from the semi-automatic rifles they proudly held aloft.

His speech then detoured for the best part of two hours to touch upon the meaning of the word “groceries”, the need to annex Greenland, a detailed explanation of the failed repainting of the Washington Mall’s reflecting pool, and the size of the late golf champion Arnold Palmer’s penis.

Mr Trump then stopped speaking for around 30 minutes to dance, apparently to the Village People’s hit song YMCA although neither the song nor any music was playing at the time.

After ending his awkward silent dance moves, the President declared America to be “the greatest nation that ever ruled the world”, at which the crowd again erupted into chants of “USA!, USA!, USA!”.

Trump then added: “Today to put that beyond doubt I have also issued an executive order to rename the United States of America as the American United American States of American America.”

The President then left the stage to wild chants from the crowd of ” AUASAA!, AUASAA!, AUASAA!” and more sustained semi-automatic rifle fire.

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