Anyone out there thinking of voting against the Labor and Liberal UNA Party at the next federal election?

Smash the bastards for the dreadful things they stands for, right?

Make them …sorry, what’s that? … you weren’t aware of the Labor and Liberal UNA Party?

Nevertheless, some fat cunt from Queensland is urging you to send it into political oblivion, spending a motza on a bottom strip on the front page of metropolitan mastheads to achieve that, including four times over the past week in The Sydney Morning Herald alone (at top and below).

Add that to double-page spreads inside the fish wrappers over recent times and leaflets such as the one pictured lobbing into letterboxes the breadth and depth of this great racist brown land and, yes, Clive Palmer looks set to spend even more at the expected 2028 election than with his Trumpet of Patriots last time and some other name the time before.

As a self-proclaimed billionaire, if Palmer wants to waste more than $120 million over the next two years rather than give donations like the $40 million that wonderful Queensland couple pledged to medical research recently, then that’s his way of doing business. And should we care? At least he’s helping the Herald stay alive for a bit longer.

But, fuck us all roan, couldn’t those front-page ads reflect the supposed intelligence of a man who has gotten as far as Palmer has, even without a Titanic replica and failing utterly to put into Parliament anyone with an ounce of style or class or logical thought? Or an IQ larger than flea droppings.

Which brings us back to whoever design that Herald front-page strips – the ones Palmer presumable ticked off on before heading out for a brisk working lunch -and that heading: SMASH LABOR & LIBERAL UNA PARTY!

A poorly designed and non-sensical top of an ad that will be the only thing readers will remember before moving on from casual glances as they ponder how many SMH pages they normally need to line their cocky’s cage. Not even a fucking colon!

If Palmer hopes to gain an even larger primary vote than…

… last time, may we humbly suggest that SMASH LABOR AND THE LIBERALS: VOTE UNA! might have been more effective? A slightly better total waste of money? Or to paraphrase Vera Lynn, It might just give voters something to remember you by! Or at least put your primary vote in 2028 above the informal tally.

Don Gordon-Brown

Want to be alerted immediately a new blog hits Australia’s longest running and most offensive satire site? Simply click on the Follow sign or the link below to be emailed new yarns the moment they are uploaded! The very second we go far too far – and trust us we will – you can then quickly unfollow via the three dots!

Follow The Bug Online on WordPress.com