Gerard Henderson rushed to hospital

MEDIA NEWS:

SYDNEY: Prominent Murdoch media Righter and full-time monitor of the Australian Broadcasting Corporation, Gerard Henderson, (main picture) has collapsed at work and is being treated in hospital after completing his latest column.

The column written for the website of News Crap Australia’s national broadshit The Australian (below) explores the possibility that the recent polling surge in One Nation’s support might eventually lead to the elimination of “left wing” bias at the ABC by having Pauline Hanson using her influence in any future federal government to slash its budget or eliminate it altogether.

A colleague of Henderson’s in the Sydney headquarters of News Crap Australia said the veteran anti-ABC campaigner had just finished his latest column when he collapsed.

“As usual, Gerard could be heard throughout the newsroom muttering about ‘lefties’ and ‘commos’ as he bashed away at his typewriter,” the source who wished to remain anonymous said.

“Yes, he uses an upright 1950s model Remington Rand typewriter that still has a pound sign key and no dollar key. It makes a hell of a racket when he’s hard at work, but then again so does Gerard.

“Gerard was also muttering, as he usually does, about ‘treasonous Grace Tame’ or ‘Disgrace Tame’, and ‘China spy’ Laura Tingle, or ‘Mata Hari’ as he refers to her as well as applying ‘antisemitic’ after the names of any and all of the news and current affairs reporters he mumbled about.

“We could tell he was near competing his column when his muttering became more rapid-fire and louder and he started telling himself, ‘This could be it! Pauline [Hanson] might actually kill the ABC!’

“He then added, ‘Rupert, it could be all yours!’, before he pulled the last sheet of his column and its carbon copy out of the Remington’s roller and rushed it to the subs desk saying, ‘My work here may well be done!’

“It was just then that he collapsed to the floor and an ambulance was called. Luckily the last we heard from the hospital is that Gerard is not in danger but still needs treatment for a few days at least. (below)

“The doctors could tell that because when he roused the first thing he asked for was a remote control so he could turn on the ABC channels to see if the national broadcaster was still on air or if all of its channels were now badged as Sky News.

“Poor thing, it’ll be hard to break it to him that Pauline Hanson hasn’t yet destroyed the ABC, but someone will have to do it eventually,” the source said.

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