Palmer scoffs at poll spend claim

FEDERAL POLITICS:

An angry Clive Palmer has lashed out at suggestions that he will be ploughing more than $100 million into United Australia Party advertising spending for the looming federal election.

“Do I look fucking stupid?” the mining billionaire, UAP founder and the party’s No 1 Queensland Senate pick, told The Bug this morning as he campaigned in north Queensland with Mount Bartle Frere as his backdrop (above).

“I read that rubbish comment by that left-wing woke-wanker Quentin Dempster that I’d be throwing more than $100 million into the campaign, that I’d already spent a motza and that spend would be ramped up over coming months.

“Well it’s all bullshit, just like the suggestions that I spent $82 million in the 2019 campaign to keep that lying heap of shit and zillion (sic)-dollar tax and spender Bill Shorten out of The Lodge.

“I can tell you up front and right here and right now that my spend through companies I own will be absolutely zero for this year’s election.

“It’s true that all those roadside billboards and cross-media ads you already see all around the nation will end up as a saturation blitz coverage across print, electronic media and every other imaginable platform by polling day, and, yes, it will end up about $120 million.

“But as soon as the current Betfair odds of 3 to 1 for an LNP victory blows out to 5 to 1 – and the way Scottie couldn’t give a rats at the moment means he’ll get me there soon enough – I’m going to take a $30 million bet on Morrison retaining power.

“That’s $120 million for the campaign and I get to pocket my original bet. Why use your own hard-earned when you can use someone elses’s, eh?

“I’m a deadset fucking genius. No wonder I’m so rich.

“It’s a fucking win-win for me really because selling a party to moronic voters is no different from selling them soap powder.

“And $120 million of someone else’s fucking money sells you a lot of soap powder, I can tell you, especially when the buyers are dumb-as-fuck Queenslanders, right?

“No, I’ve got to help Scottie win again even though he’s bloody awful. Besides, if that cunt Albanese gets in, any application of mine with the words ‘Mineralogy’ or ‘Waratah’ in it will be shunted sideways to a five-year review process before a parliamentary panel that doesn’t exist! Not that you could blame him.

“I’ve got to get that dud Morrison across the line and only I – or I should say Betfair – has the money to do it!

“I’m a deadset fucking genius. No wonder I’m so rich.”

AT TOP: Clive Palmer (left) and Mount Bartle Frere (right).