WASHINGTON DC: US President Donald Trump has denied that new major construction works at the White House are part of precautions against a Democratic Party majority in both houses of Congress after the November mid-term elections.

“That’s fake news,” the President yelled at White House press pool reporters in the Oval Office who asked questions about the work being undertaken to build a continuous high wall and moat around the White House. (main  picture)

“These new projects have been on the drawing board for some time. I have spoken about them quite often,” he lied.

“They fit in with my overall plan to revamp and revitalise the Whites’ House,…. I mean the White House.

“As you know I have initiated my new ballroom, new flagpoles, the concreting of the Rose Garden, and a new helipad.

“The wall and water feature – not a moat, not a moat – are just the next two items on my list of projects to initiate before I start my third term,…. I mean before I finish my second and last – for the time being – term.

“The way you people in the fake news media go on anyone would think these new projects are protection for me against police, military, or judicial officers seeking to enter the White House grounds and arrest or detain me.

“Besides, I have immunity from prosecution for almost everything I do. If you remember, the Donald J Trump Supreme Court made that ruling, so it’s the law and there’s nothing you in the fake media can do about it.”

Reporters then reminded the President that if he enjoyed immunity, the same immunity would logically extend to the next President and, if he or she were a Democrat, it would protect them against any action taken to detain or arrest President Trump to face charges for the numerous instances of open and unapologetic official corruption he had committed while in office.

At that point the Oval Office was evacuated by reporters, not at the direction of presidential aides which usually happens, but voluntarily as the stench of faeces exploding from the President’s diaper filled the room and plopped onto the floor behind the Resolute Desk.

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