
The column that has fun with the smaller mistakes and missteps of Australia’s mainstream mediocre; that pays homage to those sweet little fishes that individually don’t amount to a full meal but collectively can cause a tummy upset over the overall state of the once great and noble craft of journalism in this country.

The bitter and twisted old hacks who compile this column wouldn’t mind a quid each for every time over the years they’ve used the word “picky” before describing some unfortunate little journalistic misstep that tickled their fannies.
So maybe the often-used warning of “Picky? ‘ or indeed “Picky? Picky? Picky?” might also be suitable here before we have a go at National Nine News reporters James Wilson and Alison Piotrowski? No. Bugger it. Our beef has often been about the blatant misuse of a word that has an unshakeably clear definition.
Like tsunami, for example.

Regardless of their cause, tsunamis originate in the ocean and nowhere else. They can move onshore and quite a ways inland but that’s only because of where they started from.
Once on land, often arriving in the series mentioned above, they can cause a dreadful loss of life and massive destruction of infrastructure.
But all of our research shows that a tsunami has never been powerful enough to work its deadly way up to the southern slopes and foothills of the Himalayas.
Despite all this, let’s see what Nine News reporter Alison Piotrowski had to say on National Nine News to kick off its 6pm Thursday edition: “An inland tsunami splits a bridge in two…”
Showing his own support for what we guess is a new wave of journalistic expression, her colleague James Wilson 24 hours later tells us that…”a Himalayan tsunami bursts the [river] banks…”
The compilers of Mediocre Bytes have never minded a bit of colourful writing in its rightful place but the basic meaning of words still matters? Maybe that shit has sailed?
A deadly, metres-high flash river flood caused by a major glacial slip off a Himalayan mountain remains a flash flood event as it should so ever be.
So, are the old fossils who write this shit spot on here, or are they once again being far too picky?
If you think they have a good point to make, tap your space bar twice now. If you’ve marked them pedantically picky, wave your keyboard mouse in the air for three seconds.
The results will be collated at the end of the weekend and made known to our reader.

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