WASHINGTON DC: Powerful elements within the US Democratic Party have begun a rearguard action to ensure “a safe and electable” candidate is picked to carry its banner in the 2028 presidential election.

The right-wing congressional and administrative Democrats have been alarmed by several wins chalked up so far by candidates from the left wing of their party who have defeated traditional centrist or right-wing Democrats in primary or general elections.

Under a previously secret plan which can be revealed exclusively by The Bug, the party’s governing body, the Democratic National Committee (DNC), is currently working on a plan to return former president Joe Biden to the White House.

“We are very worried that the so-called democratic socialists who have won a string of elections – the most high-profile being New York Mayor, Zohran Mamdani – may turn off more conservative Democrat voters,” the DNC source said.

“That’s why we’re developing a robotic Biden (main picture) complete with artificial intelligence (AI) and on-board computers that will more than pass as the real thing.

“Our polling finds strong residual support for Joe in the electorate which has only grown stronger as President Trump’s popularity and mental facilities crumble.

“The ‘new Joe Biden’ as he will be marketed to voters, will be very fit and athletic, mentally sharp, physically agile, and, courtesy of AI, will have an encyclopaedic knowledge of all policy areas across the federal government, as well as foreign and domestic affairs.

“There’ll be no repeat of the infamous stumbling over answers in his 2024 debate with Trump.”

Asked if the robotic Biden was likely to appeal to younger and more radical voters, the DNC source was confident it would.

“The new Biden may well be, at least in principle, 85 years old at the time of the 2028 presidential campaign, but our road tests so far prove that he’ll show all the agility – both mentally and physically – of someone half his age,” the DNC source said. (below)

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