

MIAMI, FL: US Supreme Court Justice, John Roberts, has defended a decision to permanently relocate the US Supreme Court to Miami in Florida.
Chief Justice Roberts told a news conference in Washington that the court and all of its judges (below) would vacate the Supreme Court building on Capitol Hill which has been its home since 1935.

“I haven’t decided on a new location in Miami just yet but I can say that there is a wing at the Mar-a-Largo resort that looks pretty good to me,” he said while sporting the new judicial robes he had ordered to be made for Supreme Court members. (main picture)
Chief Justice Roberts rejected suggestions that the move was waste of taxpayers’ funds given that the existing Supreme Court building had recently undergone a renovation program which included the insertion of the words “THE DONALD J TRUMP AND” above the words “UNITED STATES SUPREME COURT BUILDING” at its entrance plus a change to the court’s motto on its pediment from the original “EQUAL JUSTICE UNDER LAW”. (below)

The move to Miami comes on the heels of two recent Supreme Court majority rulings that critics claim were politically motivated to support President Trump’s anti-immigration policies.
The nine-member court ruled in 8-3 decisions that the President had the power to deport hundreds of thousands of migrants living legally in the US under temporary protected status. It also ruled 8-3 that the Trump administration had the power to block most asylum seekers from entering the country.
Chief Justice Roberts said the court’s planned move to Florida was also decided in an 8-3 vote.
“When I put it to a vote I had the support of five other justices so together with my vote that made it 8-3 in favour of shifting south,” he explained.
When quizzed on the voting figures, given that the court has only nine justices, Mr Roberts said he had also recently instituted a change in court procedures.
“I thought it only fair that the President and Vice-President also get a vote whenever the court relies on a vote to decide a case or question,” he said. “I’m pretty sure that’s in line with the Constitution. Well, both the President and Vice-President told me it was.”
Chief Justice Roberts responded firmly to a reporter who asked whether the court’s recent rulings showed a willingness by a majority of its justices to support politically motivated attacks on immigrants despite their legal status.
“Quiet. Quiet piggy,” he replied. “That question is fake news. The court has a duty to pass judgement on immigrants because they’re eating the dogs! They’re eating the cats!”
The Chief Justice then departed the news conference while performing an awkward dance to the tune of the Village People’s YMCA.

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