New fossil unearthed

Palaeontologists working on an excavation site in Canberra have unearthed a fossil they believe could be millions, if not billions of years old.

Head of the University of Canberra’s geology department, Professor Clay Boulder, said he believed the fossil (main picture) was one of the oldest ever found in the region.

“We haven’t yet clearly determined just how old it may be,” Prof Boulder said.

“But we can say it was most likely laid down millions of years ago, possibly when dinosaurs roamed the earth – well before they all died out and were laid down to form the fossil fuels we still exploit to this day.”

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Controversial building union boss John Setka says employers in South Australia have nothing to fear provided they work in a co-operative manner with him as the new secretary of the state branch of the Construction Forestry Maritime Mining and Energy Union (CFMMEU).

Mr Setka was recently elected as SA state secretary of the activist trade union on top of his job as state secretary in both Victoria and Tasmania.

Building companies fear that under Mr Setka’s leadership the CFMMEU in SA will initiate widespread industrial disruption including strikes to achieve its stated goal of 100% unionised building sites and end the use of labour-hire companies providing non-union workers.

But Mr Setka has attempted to settle their nerves.

“Bosses have nothing to fear as long as they adopt a co-operative approach to our union,” he said.

“The first step I’ll be taking is to invite all building company CEOs to discuss with me the issues involved.

“I find the best approach is for us to join together, engage in some jazz ballet and ikebana – in total silence of course – before we all have a sensory hot rock massage. (pictured)

“Only then do we talk while sitting on tatami mats in a learning circle in a room filled with the sweet, sweet aroma of burning incense.

“I do hope CEOs will join me, after all we are all on a shared journey and I have many learnings to bring to the table from my work in Tassie and Victoria,” Mr Setka said.

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A news conference in Sydney this morning was cancelled after chair of the Australian Rugby League Commission, Peter V’Landys, collapsed and was rushed to hospital.

Mr V’Landys had called the news conference to lambast the NSW Premier Dominic Perrottet for allegedly breaking a “deal” with the NRL to inject $250 million into stadium rebuilding projects at three Sydney clubs on top of around $1 billion already committed to other stadium projects.

He had begun to again attack Mr Perrottet and to repeat his threat of moving the NRL grand final from Sydney to Brisbane for a second time if the Premier did not commit the funds.

However, Mr V’Landys suddenly slumped back in his chair, visibly shook, remained open-mouthed, began sweating heavily as the colour drained from his face, then collapsed and fell to the floor when a reporter asked if the NRL ever spent any of its own money.

Mr V’Landys was rushed by ambulance to the St Vincent’s Hospital where he is reported to remain critical – of the NSW government and any other that doesn’t open their treasury and provide a blank cheque to the NRL.