Grace fails under pressure

THE ABC:

ABC TV has started screen testing possible replacements for Leigh Sales as host of its nightly 7.30 public affairs program.

The first person to be assessed by the program’s producers was former Australian of the Year, Grace Tame, whose audition consisted of interviewing Prime Minister Scott Morrison (main picture).

“The 7.30 show rang and asked if the boss was available for an interview,” a source within the Prime Minister’s Office (PMO) said

“Naturally we gave them our standard ‘no’. I just forget what excuse we used this time, probably that he had another very important engagement that couldn’t be broken.

“Yeah, like taking his weekly ukulele lesson,” the source said before laughing hysterically for several minutes.

“We always say no to 7.30 because who in their right mind would want to be grilled by Leigh Sales? Especially the PM after the week he’s had. Well, the entire term he’s had really.

“But then they rang back soon after and told us Leigh wouldn’t be doing the interview. They actually said it would be a tame interview, so the boss jumped at the chance.

“But when he walked into the studio and realised it was a Tame interview and not a tame interview he literally shit himself.

“I tell you what, it was Engadine Maccas all over again, or all over the floor I should say as some of it ran down his trouser leg and filled his shoes.

“Christ did it stink too. It really put Grace off her game. She started off being very professional and polite. Peter Van Onselen would have been proud.

“But when she copped a whiff of the PM’s cacked daks she changed completely and screwed up her face and gave him the old side eye.

“The whole interview just went downhill from there. It was a disaster but luckily the ABC said it wasn’t going to screen it.

“I heard later that they didn’t like the way Grace handled the situation.

“They’ve got a point. Admittedly it was the PM who shat himself – again – but I reckon Leigh Sales would have soldiered on regardless.

“Still, there was a bright side to it all. They didn’t give Grace the 7.30 job so I guess the day wasn’t a complete loss,” the PMO source said.