The Bug recently published a world-exclusive extract from Prime Minister Scott Morrison’s first attempt at romance fiction writing, a bodice-ripper very much in the Mills and Boon style.
The Widow of Warringah is the steamy story about the chance encounter on a world-famous beach in Sydney of an impressionable young woman, not beautiful by any stretch of the imagination but pretty enough in a strange sort of way, and a handsome man-about-town from the Shire.
The Bug received countless messages of praise for Mr Morrison’s efforts after that first extract appeared, all hoping he will become a full-time novelist after the looming federal election.
We are now extremely privileged to offer a second extract from the book penned during the PM’s well-earned holidays at Kirribilli House over Xmas-New Year.
In it, we find the novel’s handsome hero Morris Scotson pondering where his growing friendship with Beris Gladjiklian is headed.
Will things between them heat up as nature intended? Find out yourself as you enjoy this latest extract from….
The Widow of Warringah
“What on earth am I doing here,” marketing guru Morris Scotson pondered as, for the seventh weekend in a row, he made his way to Manly on the green-hulled, cream-decked MV Collaroy to spend time with a tiny little sheila by the name of Beris Gladjiklian.
“Seventh trip,” he thought, and I haven’t even made first base with her!”
“Hell, I haven’t even got to Number 2 – upstairs, outside – with this infuriating piece of skirt!”
Morris admitted to himself there was something irresistible about this pocket dynamo of a woman he had met by chance almost two months earlier, even though she continued to swat away his advances like a bothersome mozzie at dusk.
They shared so much in common and both thought John Howard was doing a great job as prime minister. And Beris had laughed heartily when Morris had done his squeaky-voiced “I’ll determine who swims at this beach and the circumstances of that swim” imitation of arguably the nation’s great leader ever.
But more than that, Morris believed they were destined to share a connection of a more primitive nature and that would be expressed sooner than later. It would reach its climax later today, he vowed.
After their surf swims, he had loved the way she tossed her thick black hair from side to side, allowing saltwater droplets to run down her neck and disappear into forbidden shadows between her pert and ample breasts.
He thought naturally enough of how he’d love to run a frustratingly slow tongue around the dark-brown areola surrounding each of her erect nipples. That would certainly have the prissy, precious young thing calling out for his cervix crusher in no time flat!
And a few weeks earlier as she plopped down onto the sand, the modesty skirt on her sensible one-piece bathing costume had shifted slightly and Morris had caught a brief glimpse of black smudge at the tops of her ample inner thighs.
Beris’s skin colour and that dark hair belied her Armenian heritage and Morris pondered once more of the beaver’s lodge that clearly had made its overcrowded home inside those bathers.
The MV Collaroy had begun to toss and turn as it made its way across the open water between the two Sydney Heads and because of that, combined with the pulsating beat of the ferry’s screws and his own carnal musings, Morris found himself having to adjust his casual-wear shorts to calm the beast that was stirring there.
“No, no more pussy-footing around, Beris!” Morris thought as he pushed down the awakening giant, “your pussy and my middle foot are going to get to know each other very, very well, later today.”
Morris smiled at his cleverness with words and he wondered if he should make up a three-word slogan to match the horizontal folk-dancing mission he’d set himself for the day.
But that only got him to thinking again about the absolute madness of his infatuation with this damned elusive woman.
And why? Back in the Shire, he had only just met a lovely young girl named Penny and, my goodness me, the things she could do with her …
“Enough, already,” Morris admonished himself, rearranging his privates once more; one in particular demanding senior commissioned rank.
“My job is to get a jab,” he muttered. “Hey, that’s not bad!”
Which only made him think over the situation once more. While he had a great job over in the Shire with the local tourist bureau, he wondered how long that could last.
They were in awe, naturally enough, of his marketing genius but his brilliant ideas sometimes appeared to his superiors as being too futuristic … or maybe just too clever for those half-brain dead morons to comprehend.
He clenched his fists momentarily and a scowl blighted his handsome face as he thought of the dunderheads he had to deal with there on a daily basis. “What the bloody hell am I doing there?” he asked himself for the umpteenth time.
He thought briefly again about Penny once more and marvelled anew at the things she could do with her …he must ask her if she was educated in the state-school system.
The only problem with Penny was that she was one of those Pentecostal happy-clapper types and Morris had no time for such gibberish. All that talking-in-tongues and rapture rubbish.
Still, he was considering a career in politics – he knew he was immensely popular with the rank-and-file Liberal Party members in Cook, the federal electorate that covered the Shire – and he wondered if adopting some religion or another might be a plus in those ambitions.
But enough of that. Today’s problem was that he was a young, virile and handsome man with natural desires – and needs! He had barely laid a finger on Beris and that was going to change bigtime as of today! He’d be using more than one finger and putting them where he bloody well liked!
The MS Collaroy pitched and rolled again on the swell and Morris clutched at his front of his shorts once more.
“They’re hanging loose, full of juice and ready for use,” Morris smirked to himself and instinctively felt for the wallet in one of his shorts pockets, feeling the comforting rim of the extra-large condom he kept there.
“You’re in for a real treat today, Beris, my love” he smirked as the MS Collaroy settled on calmer waters as it approached Manly Harbour, bringing Morris closer to his prey.
To be continued.
Missed the first extract from Scott Morrison’s amazing literary debut. Read it here at: