Morrison surveys lie of the land

The one thing you’ve got to give Scott Morrison is that he’s refreshingly dishonest.

Maybe it comes from lying being his default position on just about anything – no, make that everything – but the way he effortlessly adds a fresh layer of lies on top of a previous one is worthy of some grudging admiration, surely?

For there’s never been an Australian politician like him. Most pollies caught telling a porky might try some weasel words in mitigation for said untruth but Morrison instinctively knows that salvation lies in doubling down.

Take electric vehicles. Earlier this year, the PM was aghast at suggestions that he’d bagged EVs during the 2019 election.

“It’s good technology,” he lied with pentecostal conviction.

Of course, as we all know, back in 2019 Morrison basically declared an EV couldn’t pull the skin off a custard pudding. It was a lie back then because EVs were already on the market that were just as powerful as conventional internal combustion engines. The Ford Ranger 23,000XL that needed two suburbs to be garaged properly could still go from nought to 100 in the time it takes the PM to tell a fib.

Social mediocre was quick to run video of Morrison’s “it’s good technology” with all the lies he said back on the 2019 hustings. “It’s not gonna tow your trailer. It’s not gonna to tow your boat.” Bill Shorten and Labor were going to “steal your weekend”.

Now, Morrison would have seen that pisstake footage of his mendacity. He had to be aware of how untruthful he had been with his “good technology” comment.

Lesser, mortal pollies would have made some adjustments to their spiels, covered their tracks with something along the lines of “yes, I did say those things back then but technology has come a long way since”. A reasonable facesaver, wouldn’t you think?

He had in fact given that a test run recently, declaring charging stations had improved a lot, inferring an EV can now be recharged in under a week if you’ve got the patience to wait. Yes, another lie – they haven’t improved all that much but that’s not important right now. They are taller now which means you don’t have to feed your extension cord all the way down from a fourth-floor flat!

So then we come to November 10 when a reporter asked Morrison: “How can you honestly spruik electric vehicles when you campaigned against them in the last election?”

Now, see, this is where warning bells might ring for us mere mortals who have a grasp of right and wrong, a handle on the fundamentals of hypocrisy and that inherent desire to be decent and honest human beings who are not Ted Bundy or Fred West.

But not Morrison, who has either forgotten the ribbing he took earlier in the year or probably, more accurately, remembers it very well but doesn’t care, for he replied indignantly: “But I didn’t. That is just a Labor lie. I was against Bill Shorten’s mandate policy trying to tell people what to do with their lives.”

See what he did there? Lie layered upon lie layered upon lie. Very Goebbelian. Is it only Morrison who knows that a triple lie always become a solitary rolled-gold fact?

Morrison lies with impunity because he thinks he’s got total immunity. And can you blame him for thinking that, really?

He smeared all of Labor’s policies back in 2019 with a litany of lies, smothered each and every one of them in a putrid pile of porkies, a farrago of fibs. And won doing it.

He’s not called the Liar from the Shire, the Lord of the Lies, for nothing and if Prue MacSween is right and Morrison gets to die in office decades down the track after being PM for as long as he wants, Morrison will be a natural when it comes to lying in state.

Don Gordon-Brown