Smoko due for a pollaxing

Over the next 24 hours, we should get some fairly clear evidence as to just how sadly uninformed – I was going to use fucking stupid but I’m trying to be less judgmental of late – Australian voters really are.

Two opinion polls lob in that time and the big question on everyone chapped lips is this: will a truly awful couple of weeks for Prime Minister Scott Morrison – yes, even worse than the many that have come before – and his motley mob of morons, misfits and malingerers be reflected in those poll results?

First, Newspoll, that should lob around 9.35.20 this evening, give or take a few nanoseconds that it takes some underling to sneak into the loo at Holt Street and ring @ghostwhovotes.

That’s assuming the Dirty Digger decided he wanted to lose more money than normal on tomorrow’s national broadshit, The Australian.

Newspoll has shown the government persistently lagging behind Labor by 53-47 2PP and even 54-46 a while ago, although the one three weeks back showed a slight improvement – totally undeserved but that’s not important right now – for Smoko.

The other is the Resolve Strategic Monitor monthly poll that will appear in tomorrow’s editions of the Nine Entertainment Co. mastheads, The Sydney Morning Herald and The Age.

The RSM poll when it was launched some months back thought it sounded suave and sophisticated not to strike a silly and provocative 2PP figure even if that’s what interested people really want to know but its September 19 results hinted the LNP was travelling okay, especially with Labor on only 31% primary vote.

That figure is miles behind Labor’s primary vote in Newspoll and Roy Morgan, so even allowing for the usual margin of error, someone’s or sometwo’s got things terribly wrong.

So what will these polls tell us, if their canvassers were out in the field at the exact time as a neutered PM has had to “sit, boy!” as country bulldog Barnaby Joyce decided the government’s next climate-change position and the entire government had to defy tradition and history and vote down the Speaker’s recommendation to have Christian Porter’s non-blind trust and secret-only-until-they-tell-him-when-they-want-something slush fund investigated by a parliamentary committee?

All those morons – shit, I mean voters… sorry!… out there have to be aware of those things, of course. And that’s just for starters; they then have to have sufficient operating brain cells left (fuck!) to think those circumstances warrant an adverse reaction when the pollster calls.

So should I be hoping beyond all logic and reason that these two polls will restore some of my fast-disappearing faith in my fellow Australians?

We are, after all, dealing with the almost-brain-dead (bugger!) in a handful of Queensland federal electorates who really did think Bill Shorten and Labor back in 2019 were going to steal their weekends off them by confiscating their petrol and diesel work and play vehicles and making them buy expensive EVs that couldn’t pull the skin of a custard pudding.

And all those pensioners throughout Oz who thought the franking credits they don’t have were going to be taken off them.

And the near-dead everywhere who were convinced that Labor was going to gouge their estate with a 50% death tax.

Maybe the whole world’s dumbing down but we’re still talking here about far-too-many Australians who would make Pauline Hanson look overqualified for Mensa membership.

Shit! Fuck! Poo! SORRY!

Don Gordon-Brown