Really, Paul Bongiorno? Really?

For fuck’s sake, Paul Bongiorno! Not you, too?

What is this obsession among the nation’s politics writers and commentators that they simply must attribute to Scott Morrison any marketing skills whatsoever, let alone that he’s some form of fucking genius.

In an otherwise excellent The New Daily piece detailing the PM’s dilemma over reaching a climate-change policy that the rest of the world still might openly laugh at, Bongiorno talks of Smoko’s marketing skills; all of them in fact.

Bongiorno must know that The Betoota Advocate’s @ScottiefromMarketing was a pisstake, right?
Then again maybe not.

Bongiorno is one of a handful of former mainstream politics scribes who apparently went through a decency dip after those careers ended and they crossed over to various minor tributaries feeding into that mainstream.

They know who they are. These scribes who suddenly could see Smoko for the lying, deceitful cunt that he is.

But some things clearly have not been erased in the new, improved, more balanced, deeper thinking, largely centred Paul Bongiorno.

I can’t for the life of me see any hint at any time in his life that Morrison has possessed even a modicum of marketing skills.

Let’s take a look.

In the business world, he got tossed out of the two big marketing jobs he had, and all for the very wrong reasons. Some skillset there.

His ability to market himself as a worthy politician turned to shit.

He lost his preselection run for Cook by 82-8 to Michael Towke. That 10-1 margin came about largely because Towke was a nice, decent person and would have made a fine, honourable, caring local member.

Smoko went crying to Liberal Party HQ and they got Rupert Murdoch’s Daily Torygraph to do a hatchet job on Towke through a series of highly defamatory and untrue articles, over which the paper later forked out a large sum to Towke long after the damage was done. The settlement would have been larger but Towke took a principled stand and refused to sign a non-disclosure agreement.

Are the above incidents the ones that laid the foundation for Borngiorno’s assessment of Smoko’s skills.

Then again, maybe it was the 2019 “miracle” election?

Was it the way this marketing genius got well and truly beaten by Bill Shorten in the TV debates that impressed Borngiorno.

Or was it Smoko’s campaigning skills centred on fuck-all policies of his own, a litany of lies about just about every Labor policy, ongoing personal attacks on Shorten and the never-ending photo ops when he wasn’t sitting back on his lardarse letting Newscorpse crucify Labor over the cost of doing something about climate change.

Perhaps Bongiorno missed the point that Smoko and the LNP slowly lost ground in all the polls right up to election eve.

Just enough voters in just enough seats swung late and yet Bongiorno thinks that had more to do with Smoko’s marketing skills than the unprecedented $90 million-plus anti-Labor ads by Clive Palmer – a swag of it in that last week – and the very late online Labor death tax scare that Smoko had fuck all to do with?

Or has it been anything Smoko has tried of recent months as he desperately seeks the right image to save his political hide. He tried Open Up and Live with COVID Man; switched to Fortress Australia Man; flew briefly as Vaccine Man before ditching that costume; saw Freedom Man fail to fly as the reason for a November/December election; and of late has now wriggled into his Climate Change Man costume that will probably only impress those who thought back in 2019 that their petrol and diesel work and recreational vehicles were going to be taken off them and their weekends stolen.

If Bongiorno thinks anything that I’ve summarised above warrants Smoko being described in any way, shape or form as some sort of marketing genius, then I’ll happily stop reading his pieces and turn to more conventional works of fiction. I’ve got a few Jack Reachers lying about.

Don Gordon-Brown