The Wiggles go to Canberra

A major overhaul of the international children’s entertainment group The Wiggles will see a specialised version of the ensemble covering federal politics.

The original Wiggles formed in Sydney in the 1990s has since grown to a worldwide industry with dedicated franchised groups in a number of foreign markets who sing in their native language.

“The Wiggles have come a long, long way since Anthony Field, Murray Cook, Greg Page and Jeff Fatt pulled on their coloured skivvies and took to the stage,” a spokesperson said.

“There has since been a number of line-up changes as original members decided to retire and franchised versions of The Wiggles have also been established in some foreign markets where they perform in their native language.

“We are continuing to evolve the concept and we are always on the lookout for new markets for The Wiggles brand.

“It recently occurred to management that there as a gap in the local market that the group was in a perfect position to fill, namely to establish a franchised version of The Wiggles based on federal politics.

“We quickly drafted a shortlist of pollies who have proved adept at wiggling out of any responsibility for the policy issues for which they have responsibility.

“The culling of the long list for male members was very onerous but we think we have got it right with Scott Morrison, Barnaby Joyce, and Josh Frydenberg – or just Scotty, Barney, and Joshie as they’ll be known to audiences.

“Finding a female members was far more difficult simply because of the lack of women in federal politics.

“We used several test audience of pre-schoolers to find out which federal female pollie would be suitable to join the new franchised group.

“I won’t name names, but I will say that we quickly settled on Gladys very quickly after we put Michaelia Cash on stage (pictured) for a closed audition and the live audience bolted for the doors.

“It was a terrible scene with parents and toddlers all making a run for the doors, many of them screaming or in tears.

“So we turned our attention to state politics and the name Gladys Berejiklian jumped off the page.”

The new version of The Wiggles is expected to have their premiere performance in Canberra in coming weeks.