North Korea rejects rumours

FOREIGN AFFAIRS:

North Korea has denied rumours that its leader Kim Jong Un has died. 

A spokesperson for the North Korean Embassy in Canberra said the rumours were not true.

To support their denials, embassy staff released photographs showing the nation’s leader riding on horseback (main picture) and addressing a meeting of the Supreme People’s Assembly of the ruling Communist Workers’ Party (pictured).

1kimjong2“The glorious Supreme Leader of the glorious and supreme Democratic People’s Republic of Korea is in glorious and supreme health,” an embassy spokesperson said.

“He is actively and gloriously engaged in a range of supreme and glorious activities each day that are all aimed at celebrating and improving the glorious lives of the people of our Supreme Motherland.”

The spokesperson said the North Korean government believed the international rumours of Kim Jong Un’s demise had started by a simple misunderstanding.

“We believe this false and malicious rumour being spread by western capitalist running dogs began by accident but has since been spread in a very deliberate fashion to damage our glorious and supreme Mother Land and its glorious people,” he said.

“We believe American spies from the CIA or perhaps from the UK’s MI6 were listening in to a recent conversation our glorious Supreme Leader was having by telephone in his glorious and supreme office in Pyongyang.

“Our glorious Supreme Leader was in fact talking to a dear and glorious friend about his father, our dear departed glorious Dear Leader Kim Jong Il.

“Clearly those eavesdropping spies mistakenly thought ‘Kim Jong Il’ meant ‘Kim Jong ill’ and the rumour started from there.

“But I can say unequivocally that it is not true.

“In addition, our glorious people are very happy. They have plenty to eat, and there are no forced labour camps anywhere in our glorious Mother Land. Thank you,” the spokesperson said.