I’ve got a very simple message for Mathias Cormann and just about everyone else in the Morrison ministry: if you want to stop being compared with Nazis, stop acting like Nazis.
I still have no fucking idea why veteran political reporter Paul Bongiorno buckled and issued an unreserved apology to Cormann after The Saturday Paper scribe accused the Finance Minister of Goebbelian tactics.
Bongiorno had absolutely nothing to apologise for. Although his tweet has been removed, it apparently made the quite reasonable claim that Cormann uses tactics made famous by Hitler’s propaganda minister: if you tell a lie long enough, it becomes the truth.
Does anyone seriously doubt that’s exactly what Cormann and just about every other minister from Morrison down do day in and day out? And have for years.
Yet, flushed with faux outrage and using diversionary tactics Rommel would have been proud of, Herr Cormann accused Bongiorno of calling him a Nazi.
I might have a German accent, Herr Cormann wailed, but I’m an Australian. Which the Belgium-born Cormann most definitely is. No-one said otherwise.
Piling in on Bongiorno and setting meaningless side brush fires with their faux outrage were new Victorian senator Sarah “Swimming pool anyone?” Henderson and Joel “Anyone who criticises anything I do is an anti-Semitic” Frydenberg.
But here’s the rub, Herr Cormann, Herr Frydenberg and Fräulein Henderson and countless other very nasty if not Nazi members of the Abbott, Turnbull and Morrison governments.
If you didn’t want to be labelled Nazis, you would have had nothing to do with the gross misuse of state resources to target three senior Labor figures through costly, taxpayer-funded royal commission witchhunts.
The RC into trade union (read Julia Gillard and Bill Shorten) corruption found no hanging offences but that didn’t stop you all from a reichous attack for years afterwards, especially on Labor’s Opposition leader.
Goebbels would have flushed with envy at the non-stop assault on Shorten, the lies that shredded his character – he was an habitual liar himself, a sycophantic brownnoser who cared not a jot for workers but only for himself; the lengths you all went to to dehumanise him as a snake-in-the grass slithering his way to the Lodge.
It was rarely an attack on his policies; it was a full-frontal on his personal traits. Who would like a dollar for every time during last year’s election that Morrison said “Bill Shorten lies. That’s all he ever does; he lies and he lies and he lies”. Amazing chutzpah from the Liar from the Shire.
Very, very Nazi business from all of you. And don’t get all puffed up with indignation, pat down your brown shirts and demand an apology. You don’t deserve one and you won’t be getting one.
If you didn’t want to be labelled Nazis, you would have had nothing to do with all those lies for those six long years about Labor’s debt and deficit. The lies about the state of the economy under your watch; terrible debt figures that the mainstream media would have ripped you to shreds over if Labor had been in office.
If you didn’t want to be labelled Nazis, you would have had nothing to do with the classic misuse of the state’s resources to retain power at any cost.
Tim Wilson’s taxpayer funded travelling parliamentary inquiry into Labor’s franking credits policy. Unprecedented, unethical, convention-busting Nazi business.
The hundreds of millions of public money on pre-poll ads pushing the few shit policies you had. Okay, both sides have done it but you took it to Zugspitzean heights.
The billion-plus of dollars in sports and other rorts as you sandbagged and pork-barrelled marginal seats.
And if you all don’t want to continue to be labelled as Nazis, stop giving the impression you’ll gladly continue thrashing every principle of democratic accountability, ethical, fair behaviour and the proper use of taxpayers’ money if it means you get to stay in power.
The only signs you ever give us is that every single piece of Nazi business you’ve employed in the past seven years in power you’d repeat at the drop of a hat to achieve your aims. And that’s Nazi business indeed. You’d launch a taxpayer-funded RC into Anthony Albanese ‘corruption’ tomorrow if you thought you could get away with it. Nazi. Nazi. Nazi.
You all seem hellbent on forcing trade unions out of business, such is your dislike of working people. How very Nazi of you. You all seem hellbent on keeping those workers’ wages flatlined as deliberate government policy. Right, Herr Cormann? How very Nazi of you.
You all seem hellbent on cracking down on displays of public dissent. How very Nazi of you. You all seem hellbent on giving God-botherers and right-wingers the legal right to be bigots and homophobes. How very Nazi of you.
You’ve sooled the federal coppers onto those trade unions and journos at the Australian Broadcasting Commission that you despise. How very Nazi of you.
So, no apology from me but just the observation that if someone shouts like a Nazi and acts like a Nazi and walks like a Nazi, then in my book they’re fucking Nazis.
And that’s the truth, whether they talk with an accent that’s German, Swahili or Orkan.