Aboriginal law more black than white

POLICE ROUNDS:

Red-faced South Australian police chiefs have been forced to reinstate a constable who killed his wife after they discovered he was Aboriginal.

Constable Hugh Gnobcock had earlier been stood down from the force on the Eyre Peninsular after pointing the bone at his missus last week after a fierce domestic dispute. Mrs Gnobcock died of shame in Whyalla Base Hospital at the weekend.

Constable Gnobcock (pictured above with the bone he pointed) had been relieved of his duties after video emerged of him quite clearly drunk, swearing and laughing hysterically at his wife as he pointed the bone at her. The video went viral with countless people around the world expressing horror at what they had witnessed.

The bone is believed to have come from a mutton leg roast Mrs Gnokcock had terribly undercooked – yet again – after her husband came home cranky and exhausted from a long and tiring shift policing a local Aboriginal settlement.

The embarrassing backdown by SA police came after an elder of the Crackawobbly peoples of which Gnobcock is a member came forward in his defence.

Uncle Chuck Gnobcock told The Bug: “Under the Native Title Act of 1993, Aboriginal people are allowed to maintain ancient customs such as pointing the bone.

“Indigenous people in South Australia, particularly in the far north, have traditionally killed wrongdoers in this way for thousands of years and this right must be preserved.”

Uncle Chuck said whitey do-gooders had to understand that the pointing of the bone in Aboriginal culture “has no parallels in white fella justice”.

“Blackfella justice has never been enforced with the gravity and solemnity of whitefella justice,” Uncle Chuck said.

“The Kurdaitcha man who points the bone in Aboriginal culture often got pissed first on fermented native berries and laughed a lot and acted the goat while pointing the bone.

“It was their way of further shaming and humiliating, if you like, the offender who had gravely wronged their tribe. It’s the way it’s been done for thousands of years.

“So all those thousands of people who signed a petition calling for my son’s … I mean Hugh’s dismissal from the force showed a complete lack of understanding of Aboriginal customs and mores.”

But another Chuckawobbly elder had a completely different view.

Aunty Maud Gnobcock said: “My nephew …. I mean Hugh…. has always been a complete dill, especially when he’s on the piss. He’s a bit of a wombat, really.

“That’s why his extended family thought a career in the police force would suit him”.