Trump scoops awards

GLOBAL POLITICS:

In shock developments that will impact significantly on the 2020 US presidential elections, Donald Trump has been awarded a clean-sweep of all six Nobel Prizes including the coveted Nobel Peace Prize and has secured other prestigious honours from around the world.

The Nobel Prize Committee based in the Norwegian capital of Oslo which usually announces its annual prize winners in October, made the extraordinary decision to name Mr Trump today as the recipient of all 2019 Nobel Prizes following his sacking of his national security adviser John Bolton (main picture).

“The Nobel Prize Committee members were unanimous in their choice for the Nobel Peace Prize (pictured) for this year,” a spokesperson said.

AIRI-nobel-prize-image“They all agreed that the sacking by Mr Trump of John Bolton has dramatically improved prospects for world peace.

“To underline their decision, committee members also unanimously agreed to also award Mr Trump the 2019 Nobel Prizes for chemistry, physics, medicine, economics, and literature.

“The committee reasoned that unless we have world peace, there is no point in anyone pursuing activities in the five other prize categories. President Trump has made the world safe for these other fields of endeavour and deserves recognition for it.”

Coinciding with today’s unexpected announcement in Oslo, the board of US publication Time magazine has also made an unusually early announcement by naming Mr Trump as its Person of the Century.

“Sacking John Bolton was the single biggest step towards a more peaceful world ever taken by any world leader, let alone a US President, in the history of the human race,” the magazine’s board said in a statement issued from its New York headquarters.

“For his decision to rid himself and his administration of Mr Bolton’s influence, Mr Trump deserves to be recognised not only as Time’s Person of the Year but as our Person of the Century even though we are still only around 20% of the way through it.

“The board just can’t see anyone, anywhere doing anything more to promote peace than President Trump has done with this single simple action.”

It is believe French President Macron will today also announce the awarding of his nation’s highest award, the Legion of Honour, to Mr Trump.

Reports from London suggest Buckingham Palace is soon to release a statement declaring that Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will waive all conventions and bestow an extraordinary knighthood on Mr Trump for his decision to sack Mr Bolton.

In Sydney, it is understood that publishers of TV Week magazine are ready to announce that Mr Trump is to receive Australia’s highest civilian honour, a special one-off Gold Logie.