We’ve arrived there at last. That tipping point in our nation’s political history where three of our five largest mainstream parties now argue you can’t be a patriotic Australian unless you love our current flag to bits.

Well, that’s the new reality according to a video now amazing the X set and one I’ve called The Burns and Allen Show. Okay, I’ll try to work up a better comparison – and youse BUGgers can help; there must have been a male and female comedy duo in history who were both as mind-fucking-numbingly as stupid as each other – but for now, having watched the video over and over this morning if for no other reason than to start the day on a high marked by spontaneous bouts of giggles, I’ll describe Tony Abbott and Michaelia Cash as the stand-up comedy duo the equal of George Burns and Gracie Allen.

I think I’ve managed to put the link at the bottom of this post; I’m smart enough to realise that if I inserted it here, I’ll have lost my reader for good, the video being an absolute hootfest that would lighten up the darkest of days.

In it, the future of the Liberal Party of Australia, Abbott and Cash, have strapped on extra-strength kimbies to declare their love for the flag and Australia and this nation’s apparent core values that only the Liberal Party of Australia understands and religiously adheres to.

They’ve both been much clearer in stating this in the past but the video’s overriding message is that if you don’t love the present Australian flag, you’re not really a patriot to and of the great southern land.

What utter tosh! I’ve hated the current flag for about as long as I can remember and I reckon I’m as patriotic an Australian as anyone else. I’m a devoted britainophile (subs, check if that’s a word) but seeing the Union Jack dominate as a quarter of our flag has always given me the squirts. Watching other drunken cricket fans in my youth running around the Gabba with barely anything more than that Union Jack visible around their shoulders started those explosive anal protests. Much worse was to see ramp services for our fallen Diggers where that fucking Union Jack dominated their coffins. The images at top also show Father Bob’s funeral and some has-been politician and former Sharks supporter milking a patriotism he has never possessed.

I believe there are still many great things about Australia yet my best bet is that the Screetcher and the Mad Monk would both believe they are far more patriotic than your ranter-in-residence could ever hope to be. Are either of those clowns entitled to a national service medal?

For starters, I don’t wet my red budgie smugglers every time I see the Australian flag or when images of the British royal family are shown. If a show of my patriotism to Oz depended on my striking a special knighthood medal for the father of our current head of state and tampon substitute, I think I’d rather do myself in.

So, please, take a look at the video link below. My highlight was when the raw-onion-eater declares that it’s these Australian values so dear to the dying remnants of Bob Menzies’ Liberal Party that have shaped the lives of “every Australian”. And by that we can assume he includes our first nations people who never knew what was in store for them when those boats beached at what they’d rename as Botany Bay proudly displaying a quarter of the current Australian flag.

And after the video, go to X, type in Michaela Cash and enjoy just a sample of the terribly unpatriotic reactions to the Burns and Allen Show. Here’s a few for starters.

https://twitter.com/SenatorCash/status/2090584919601033423/video/1

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