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Jim’s latest franchisee to go in hard!

We have others but on with the show!

FRANCHISING:

Founder of national diversified home services franchise company, Jim’s Group, has launched a new service to build on his efforts to address Australia’s low birth-rate.

Jim Penman has released a book outlining his theory that casual sex, pornography, social media, gambling, and consumption of drugs, alcohol, tobacco, and unhealthy food have disrupted human brains. (below)

In his book, The Birth-Rate Crisis, Penman says such regular stimulations have desensitised modern brains to dopamine which in turn affects the effects of sex hormones on the human body.

Around the world the replacement birth rate is regarded as 2.1 children per female, just to replace a child’s parents, but in Australia the average rate is currently 1.48.

Mr Penman has revealed exclusively to The Bug that he plans to take more concrete steps to address the central problem.

“I am launching a new franchise system, Jim’s Rooting, that will help lift our low birth rate,” he said.

“I am opening expressions of interest to operate the new businesses in defined geographic areas.

“Those who take on the new franchises, mainly men because otherwise it just won’t work, will need to deliver lots of in-home services each day.

“So there is potential there for franchisees to make a lot of money, provided they can meet demand, so to speak,” he said.

Brisbane man, Studs Banger, (main picture) who wished to protect his identity, said he had invested his life savings in a Jim’s Rooting franchise covering the north-west Brisbane suburb of Ferny Grove.

“I’ve poured a lot of money and thought into this new venture,” Mr Banger said. “I’ve even worked up what I reckon is a pretty good slogan – ‘Studs Banger will look after your ferny grove!’

“I reckon I can turn a quid or two because I enjoy rooting, although I haven’t been getting much lately.

“The only problem I can foresee is if I get a job to service someone I know. I mean Ferny Grove is a pretty small suburb.

“But I am a very discreet sort of guy, so their secret will be safe with me.

“Speaking of secrets, I’ve done as much as I can to protect my own privacy after deciding to take on the franchise.

“For instance, Studs Banger isn’t my real name. It’s actually Trevor Snerd of 12 Gibson Street at Ferny Grove,” he said.

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