Hanson rehires sacked staffer

One Nation leader, Senator Aunty Pauline Hanson, has backtracked on the sacking of a key staffer following the launch of a barrage of National Party attack ads in the lead-up to the 9 May Farrer by-election.

The National Party advertising attacks One Nation over the hiring as its campaign director, convicted rapist Sean Black who was recently dismissed by the Queensland Senator and proud Mulletandchips woman of the Batteredsav nation around Tartare/Ipswich.(below)

But the ad campaign appears to have backfired with Senator Aunty Pauline (pictured above at a recent indigenous land whites protest) saying she was re-hiring Mr Black.

“I sacked him after asking my chief of staff if the stories running at the time were true and we were employing a black,” she explained.

“But now the National Party ads have explained the situation to me I’ve reversed my decision and he’s back on the payroll.”

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National franchising company, the Jim’s Group, says it is very pleased with the results of its latest venture road-tested recently by the Duke and Duchess of Sussex.

A company spokesperson said the new franchise line, Jim’s Royals, (below) proved to be a viable and profitable approach to leveraging the celebrity attached to outlying or former members of the British royal family.

“Both the Duke and Duchess of Sussex are also very happy with how the new approach worked and have thanked us for signing them up as the first franchisees under the Jim’s Royals banner,” the spokesperson said.

“We are now in negotiations with other royals or semi-royals who are very interested in buying a Jim’s Royals franchise.

“I can confirm that we are in talks with Sarah Ferguson, and her former or current husband – I can never tell which – who both are keen to buy into a franchise.

“To accommodate their current positions we’ll insert in very small letters the word ‘former’ between ‘Jim’s’ and ‘Royals’,” the spokesperson said.

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IT conglomerate Apple’s CEO, Tim Cook, has used a product launch to announce he will step down in favour of senior company executive John Ternus.

Mr Cook broke the news while releasing a new “jumbo” size version of Apple’s hugely successful iZero product whose development and launch he personally oversaw. (below)

“I’m very proud of the iZero which is the first new product I brought to market on becoming CEO in 2011 on the death of our then leader Steve Jobs,” Mr Cook told a cheering audience at Apple’s headquarters.

“Critics were quick to claim the iZero would ruin the company because it was simply a small empty white cardboard box which we were selling at [US] $400.

“What they overlooked, and what I knew, is that the iZero carried the Apple logo which means our hardcore buyers would pay that and more just to have one.

“The queues outside Apple stores when we released the iZero proved that, so I’m proud that I leave the post of CEO having launched the jumbo iZero which will be available from tomorrow for [US] $950,” Mr Cook added to wild applause from the audience who then stampeded the exits to begin lining up overnight at nearby Apple stores.

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