Poll dancing PM sparks rebellion

Senior Liberal Party tacticians are for the first time questioning the competence of Prime Minister Scott Morrison and his supposed unique and valuable political marketing skills as reputable opinion polls show Labor remains ahead of the Coalition on a two-party-preferred basis.

Key campaign strategists are moving to wrest control of the Liberal Party’s re-election campaign from the Prime Minister following a series of disastrous site visits demanded by Mr Morrison.

“Today was typical,” a Liberal Party campaign source said on condition of anonymity.

“The PM decided he wanted to do another of the sort of workplace visits he loves where he takes on the job of an average voter.

“But I ask you, what could be worse in the days following bad two-party-preferred polls than for the PM to visit a pole-dancing club as he did today? (main picture)

“We’ve tolerated other recent disastrous examples, such as when he had a go at welding and nearly blinded himself, when he creepily washed some young woman’s hair, and last week when he tried his hand at baking macarons and croissants – two items that inevitably brought back to voters’ minds comments by French President Emmanuel Macron about the PM’s level of honesty.

“But enough is enough,” the Liberal Party campaign source said, adding that the Prime Minister visited the pole dancing club because “he wanted to reinforce his ‘everyday daggy dad’ image”.

“The PM tries to promote that image as often as he can even though it’s a complete figment of his imagination,” the source said.

“There are quite a few of us who’ve really had a gutful. His tactics aren’t working.

“In fact many of us at Liberal Party campaign HQ have concluded that he does these visits and tries his hand at doing various jobs simply because he can’t do his own as PM.

“So we’re recommending that for the rest of the campaign we sideline the PM and use Deputy PM and Nationals’ leader, Barnaby Joyce, as the focus of our campaign.

“Of course that means that between now and 21 May we’ll need to have Barnaby’s media appearance done and dusted by 10am each day,” the source said.