Grave concerns over Joyce’s safety

GLADSTONE: Local police have grave concerns for the safety of Deputy Prime Minister Barnaby Joyce after a fully laden, 240-wagon, three-locomotive, coal train on its way to an export terminal here derailed as it was making its way through the general lounge area of the Gladstone Yacht Club earlier this morning.

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CANBERRA: Excited Liberal Party campaign strategists believe that yesterday has provided the perfect template on which to build a winning election outcome on 21 May.

From now on, Prime Minister Scott Morrison each and every day will only engage in a series of photo-ops to reinforce his “every man” image and will not talk to the media, while Labor Party shadow minister will foolishly continue to hold media calls, allowing the media to beat up anything they say as “major campaign gaffes that have halted the party’s momentum and have most likely cost it the election”.