Did Warnie’s life have a happy ending?

Shane Warne was a loveable larrikin who loved the ladies, right?

So would we Australians worship the King of Spin, the Earl of Twirl, the Sheik of Tweak, any less if it turns out his life had a happy ending in Thailand? Or, heaven forbid, he might have even done a Snedden and died on the job, even if it was only a head job?

Would we admire less that ball he bamboozled Mike Gatting with in 1993 – or his 700-plus Test wickets – if we knew that a single, rich, 52-year-old Aussie legend who was still incredibly good looking if a little pudgy had basic human needs?

That was the fascinating possibility that Channel 9’s 6pm news out of Brisbane teased us with last night, with newsreaders Andrew Lofthouse and Melissa Downes in their main news lead-in reporting the shock news that a Thai masseuse had been in Warne’s room just before one of the cricket legend’s mates found him unconscious.

The story never appeared in the hour-long bulletin and we can’t provide the exact words of that lead-in because it has been edited out of the version of the bulletin now up on 9Now.

MGH’s best guess is that the story was pulled after a shocked executive producer saw the lead-in and lost an entire mouthful of scotch and dry, or after a phone call came in from the Warne family lawyers threatening legal action.

Our MGH researchers also heard that the Thai lady invited to Warne’s room was a foot masseuse but are not sure that word was used in the Nine News lead-in or they heard that elsewhere. It’s hard to be precisely accurate when news footage is sanitised before our very eyes.

In any event, what foot was she there to massage, right?

“WARRR…NIE!…WARRR…NIE!…WARRR…NIE!”