Advert star faces protest

UK NEWS:

The star of a global advertising campaign for an insurance comparison website has clashed angrily this morning with anti-Russian protesters outside his London home. (main picture)

Aleksandr Orlov, who plays a wealthy Russian in the advertisements, emerged from his plush Mayfair townhouse just after dawn to confront a crowd of people picketing in support of Ukraine and carrying placards critical of Russian president Vladimir Putin.

A naked Orlov, who had not had time to don his trademark silk smoking jacket and cravat, argued loudly with the protestors, asked them to leave.

He surprised the protestors by speaking in a broad cockney accent.

According to one of the protestors, Orlov denied he had any connections with the Russian leader and explained he was a professional animal actor and was not Russian himself.

“I’m no better off dead. Sure I got a lot of bees and honey but you’re Gert and Daisy if you think it’s from any lemon and lime,” he told the crowd.

Police quickly arrived on the scene and dispersed the protest and also advised Mr Orlov to return inside his house or else to put some clothes on.

Before he departed he explained the morning’s events to reporters: “I was on my pat just having a cup of Kiki Dee and some pig and roast when I copped the box of toys and came down the apple and pears to have a butcher’s.

“I couldn’t Adam and Eve it, all these berks and jam rolls rabbit and porking about some bloke called Ollie Gark. German band on me jam tart, he’s a Queens Park Ranger to me.”

Puzzled reporters asked if he could translate his remarks for them, which he refused to do saying they had been “simples” to understand.