When things don’t quite add up

Here’s a simple arithmetic test. One plus one equals two, right?

Simple, really. An easy sum total. Now try this one.

A brilliant marketer and campaigner plus a faux election campaign that’s been going on for weeks equals?

Answer’s not jumping out at you? Does it help if I let on we’re talking about Scott Morrison here?

That’s right! So let’s strive for that logical answer to that simple addition again.

If the man who more or less single-handedly, according to most if not all in the mainstream media, won the 2019 federal “miracle” election on the back of his campaigning and marketing skills has been travelling around Australia on the public teat for the best part of a month campaigning hard – and by that I mean being photographed making pasta, driving cars, having his hair cut and pretending to put up Xmas decorations someone else probably put up, all captured by an adoring MSM or personal professional snapper – what should the product of that equation be?

That’s right! A lift in the opinion polls!

So how the bloody hell could the latest Newspoll – the first in three weeks of non-stop photo ops and a fawning media coverage of them – show the LNP government shaving a primary vote percentage point and still languishing in landslide defeat territory at 47 percent two-party preferred to Labor’s 53?

Thinking caps on, people! That’s right. Perhaps one of the factors in that basic addition is incorrect.

The faux campaign is most definitely under way so is it at all possible that the MSM’s notion that Morrison is a “formidable campaigner” – Chris Uhlmann’s exact words on Sunday night Nine News – is simply not true?

Let’s look at just one day in the faux election campaign – the Bathurst 1000 last Sunday.

Let’s listen to Morrison nailing a basic message he’s been spinning of late.

“You know, this is, you know, I’ve been saying all week we’re not looking in the rear …umm … into the rear … through the rearview mirror…”

As a wag on Twitter observed: Smoko had probably nailed the line while rehearsing in his rear-vision mirror.

Earlier on, arguably Australia’s finest ever political marketer and campaigner got all muddled up and threw logic out the win.. aah … um… the door .. the window of the sporty Ford Mustang as he was not-reportedly booed around the Panorama Mountain with driver Mark Skaife looking like he was wetting his driving suit at being in the presence of such marketing and campaigning greatness.

Morrison pointed to his fingernail marks in the top of the dashboard from the last time he undertook such a cunning, vote-winning stunt before adding that he was in a different car this time.

Wonderful spin while taking a spin. A lie, or just a goose loose with logical truth?

And how about the overall message that Morrison was trying to impart in the minds of voters while on the mountain; his overall strategy that has rusted-on rightwingers such as Uhlmann – and sadly there are far too many Uhlmanns in the MSM – praying for another well-deserved Morrison “miracle” victory.

“What we are about is getting government out of of your lives. Australians have had a gutful of governments in their lives over the last few years and they are looking forward to getting back in the driver’s seat.”

Now, you’ve got to admit: isn’t that campaigning and marketing brilliance?

Australians shouldn’t look in the rear-vision mirror because there’s a real car wreck back there, folks, after more than eight years of LNP government. It looks like that shopping mall after the Blues Brothers were finished with it.

Morrison over coming months will try on every disgusting, dishonest trick he can dredge up – every lie possible about Labor, every personal putdown of Anthony Albanese he can muster, he’ll take criminal porkbarreling to a new gold-standard level, rely hopefully on another $100 million anti-Labor ad spend from the fat controller Palmer and almost universal totally lopsided, shockingly biased support from a brown-nosing MSM – to keep a job he’s now telling Australians he doesn’t want to do.

Pure genius. Evil, sure, but pure genius.

Don Gordon-Brown