Activist released from hospital

UN CLIMATE CONFERENCE:

Australian teenage environmental activist Scomo Turdberg has been released from a Scottish hospital after being treated for injuries she says she sustained in a beating by Greta Thunberg.

Ms Turdberg said Ms Thunberg, the Swedish climate change activist, had set upon her in a corridor of the Glasgow convention centre where the UN’s COP26 conference is being held.

“Greta approached me seemingly in a very friendly way,” Ms Turdberg explained to reporters. (main picture)

“But as she got closer she quickly looked around to make sure nobody was watching and then she started to punch my lights out.

“All the while her fists were pummelling me she was yelling abuse at me just for being Australian and specifically for comments I had made defending the Morrison Government’s climate plan.

“Thankfully Mathias Cormann came along. He started to separate us and while doing so kept on saying: ‘She’s 100% right about the plan.’

“I assumed he was trying to talk sense into Greta, although it was clear that Greta thought he was talking to me.

“Whatever. The fact is if he hadn’t come along and separated us who knows what serious injuries I might have sustained.

“I can assure everyone I am doing as best as I can after treatment for some minor head injuries and I hold no grudges.

“In fact I am continuing my program of meetings with various national delegations here at Glasgow, starting with the French right after this news conference,” Ms Turdberg said.