PM stars in vaccine campaign

FEDERAL POLITICS:

Prime Minister Scott Morrison will star in a massive nationwide advertising campaign to promote the  new four-point plan to fight the COVID-19 pandemic and return national life to normal.

Senior government sources said Mr Morrison, as an acknowledged marketing genius,  had been deeply involved in the development of the campaign since he announced the four-point plan late last week.

“The PM will feature prominently in the campaign and has already been out on location shooting footage for the TV and online ads,” a senior government source said. (main picture)

“But he has also taken a hands-on role in drafting the strategy behind it.

“Because the plan itself relies so heavily on the vaccine rollout, the PM is going to announce very soon that he is going to put Bridget McKenzie in charge of allocating vaccine supplies across the nation. (pictured)

“Her return to Cabinet, courtesy of Barnaby Joyce, opens the door to tapping her unrivalled talents in the allocation of publicly funded resources.

“The PM has also declared that the preferred model for allocating vaccine supplies will be the same one that was used in 2019 to allocate infrastructure funds for railway station car parks.

“As the PM often says: ‘When you’re on a good thing, stick to it.’

“Gee, come to think of it, I wouldn’t be surprised if he, as a marketing genius, wrote that line himself.”

The government source denied the government planned to use the taxpayer-funded ad campaign to promote the Liberal Party in the lead-up to the next federal election, still expected by some observers to be held this year.

“We know that some people might level that accusation because of the LIBERAL acronym for the campaign slogan.

“That’s just a coincidence that we noticed after the PM personally wrote the slogan: Let’s Inoculate Before Epidemics Ruin Australian Life.”

When asked if the slogan was accurate, given that the coronavirus was a pandemic not an epidemic, the government source responded: “The difference is marginal.”