Satan possesses thousands on Twitter

Proof that the Devil has taken possession of the social media platform Twitter has come in the form of the frightening experiences of a number of Twitter users who have unknowingly posted bitter and twisted posts about Scott Morrison while under the Prince of Darkness’s control.

The extent of Satan’s hellish work on Twitter and Facebook was first raised the weekend before last when Prime Minister Scott Morrison warned the Australian Christian Churches’ annual conference on the Gold Coast of “the evil one’s” dastedly work on those online platforms.

“Sure, social media has its virtues and its values and enables us to connect with people in ways we’ve never had before – terrific, terrific – but those weapons can also be used by The Evil One and we need to call that out, ” the PM warned.

Which got The Bug to thinking: has the Devil taken possession of the plethora of Twitterati who post vicious and regular attacks on the leader of our nation?

We contacted the author of the tweet shown above and what she had to say shocked us at Bug HQ.

First of all, she’s a very nice retired lady – we won’t mention her name but let’s call her Shirley – who was horrified to see and read that tweet in her feed the other morning.

Her Tweet image is actually a bowl of roses, her Tweet moniker is The Human Condition and her handle is @loveisallaround.

“I would never use that awful C word regardless of what I thought of anybody,” Shirley told us, “and as a retired school teacher I would never have used ‘pudgy’ and ‘fat’ together – that’s tautological.

“Apart from anything else, my parents – God bless them – taught me that if you can’t say something nice about someone then it’s best to say nothing at all.”

Unfortunately for Shirley, her IT expert has confirmed the tweet came from her home office and in fact home security CCTV has shown her at her computer at 2am thrashing away at her keyboard and laughing maniacally.

The Bug contacted another regular Twitterer who told a similar story to Shirley’s – everything about his tweet (above) has been changed and yet he accepts it has come from his laptop.

“Most of my friends and colleagues know I’ve got absolutely no time for Morrison – frankly he makes my flesh crawl – but I’ve always believed in playing the ball and not the man.

“Besides, I am always very careful to get my tweets perfect and there’s no way I would have spelt Morrison incorrectly.

“Sorry, but I’ve got to go see my local parish priest about an exorcism.”

EDITOR’S NOTE: Are there other Twitterers out there who believe they’ve been overtaken by the Devil and have woken up horrified to see and read what they’ve had to say about Scott Morrison. a man who they know, in their heart of hearts, as a devout Christian man of faith has never, ever, resorted to stinging personal attacks on anybody?

Anyone out there feeling just a tad ashamed of being so easily dominated by The Evil One? Coalition Tea Lady? Patricia Barraclough? Noely? Mr Denmore? Eddy Jokovich? Rick? Lord God? Elaine McKay? Kailas Wild? Mark Langham? Teetering on the Edge? Dead Parrot Society? MichaelC?Thousands of others too many to mention. Anybody?