Doubters have egg all over their face!

CANBERRA: Sceptics who have suggested that Defence Minister Linda Reynolds is feigning heart issues and hiding in hospital to avoid scrutiny over how she handled a rape claim are looking pretty bloody stupid and red-faced this morning.

This follows the decision by Prime Minister Scott Morrison yesterday, growing increasingly concerned about when his senior minister might return to work and Senate Question Time, to once again ask Ms Reynolds’ cardiologist directly for a full report on how serious her heart problems are.

The Bug can now reveal that the specialist, one of the nation’s leading heart experts, has bluntly told the PM: “Linda remains seriously lacking in ticker.”

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PERTH: With the state election campaign winding down before polling day on Saturday, the latest poll contains more grim news for the Liberal Party and Opposition Leader Zac Kirkup (pictured below).

The Gallupup Poll has Premier Mark McGowan’s Labor government set to win at least 63 of the 59 seats up for grabs, with the Nationals grabbing the other two, well below the threshold for official party status.

One of the nation’s most respected politics acaemics and commentators has told Peter von Onselen that the reelected Labor government might have to nominate a handful of its own members to take on the role of official opposition “to ensure good, strong, stable and accountable government moving forward”.

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LONDON: Prince Philip’s fury at not being immediately named and blamed as the Royal who made racist comments about the colour of Archie’s skin colour is affecting his recovery in hospital from current medial problems, his specialist medical team says.

One told The Bug: “The Duke of Edinburgh has been ranting and raving about how a lifetime’s work disparaging ‘spear chuckers, boomerang throwers, chinks, darkies, slitty-eye, redskins and fuzzytops’ has apparently come to naught.

“It’s made him very distraught and stressful, conditions that can only hinder the slow recovery from current ailments of a man approaching his centenary.

“The Queen’s husband has been so put off that he’s stopped demanding that two of our specialist team – fine doctors from Pakistan and India – be replaced with white NHS nurses and shouting at them: ‘You curry-munchers should naff off back to your mud huts and take your ghastly foods with you’.”