Stench sends Sydneysiders inside

MAJOR HEALTH SCARE:

A powerful stench likened to rotten-egg gas has forced hundreds of Sydneysiders indoors early this morning and caused breathing difficulties among many of them. Some were physically ill.

What was initially feared to be some type of accidental toxic gas leak first affected people across suburbs in Sydney’s northern beaches, with many top-level white-collar executives who had just left their homes to get into their Beamers, Mercs and Audis forced to rush back into their homes to escape the all-pervasive odour.

One Northbridge resident told The Bug: “It was a dreadful pong like an animal decomposing or maybe some other type of organic matter that’s still alive but has been completely corrupted, if that makes any sense at all?”

The odour also affected many residents closer to the city with one Neutral Bay resident bluntly suggesting someone had definitely done something wrong, “Maybe an illegal burnoff?” he asked, a handkerchief still held to his face. “It also smelled a bit like wet, shredded paper if that makes any sense at all?”

The breath-stopping smell was also detected by apartment dwellers as high as the seventh level in a number of CBD streets and along Macquarie Street.

One apartment resident close to the Cahill Expressway said: “It smelled a lot like salted pork that’s gone rotten in a barrel, if that makes any sense at all?”

Luckily, NSW emergency services experts have now identified the source of the stench and have reassured Sydneysiders that while the repulsive odour was admittedly extremely unpleasant, it has no long-lasting health effects.

“It was only Premier Gladys Berejiklian being driven from her home to her parliamentary office,” a spokesperson explained.