Broncos share the joy

SPORT:

Directors of the Brisbane Broncos have held an emergency meeting to declare all members of the men’s NRL team to be honorary members of the club’s NRL Women’s team.

A club spokesperson said the decision was made at an emergency meeting held yesterday at the Broncos’ Red Hill headquarters in Brisbane (main picture) in the wake of the Broncos’ women’s team winning its third straight NRLW premiership at the weekend.

“You see the boys are a bit grumpy – jealous is probably a better word and really shitty are probably two better words – about the girls and their victory,” the spokesperson said.

“Despite how badly they played and how arrogantly they behave on and off the field, the boys all firmly believe that they should have been premiers this year, and last year, and the one before that, and next year and the next and so on. I think you know the way they think.

“If you ask them why they deserve to be premiers they really can’t verbalise it, but that’s nothing new, is it?

“So to keep them happy the club’s board of directors decided to name them all retrospectively as members of the Broncos NRLW team that beat the Sydney Roosters for the premiership,” the spokesperson said.

A representative of the Broncos’ NRL team who spoke on the condition of anonymity said he and the other players were happy with the outcome and their declaration as honorary NRLW players.

“The alternative was to have the boys undergo rapid sex reassignment surgery but declaring them as honorary NRLW players was obviously a quicker solution and somewhat less invasive as well as being cheaper,” the player said.

“But the bottom line is that all the boys are pleased we jagged a premiership. We deserve it, even if it is just an NRLW title.

“We as the men’s NRL team took out the wooden spoon this year after some shockingly bad play and some humiliating defeats, so it’s only fair that the boys share in a bit of the glory that the girls have somehow achieved.

“Well, when we say share a bit of the glory we really mean take all of it. It’ll be the boys who’ll be starring at any celebrations like a ticker-tape parade if someone wants the honour of having us there,” the player said. “The girls can tag along too if they like. That’s only fair.”