Biden minder causes stir

anews in brief dinkus

WASHINGTON: US Democratic Party officials have refused to explain the addition of a minor Las Vegas celebrity to former vice-president Joe Biden’s campaign entourage.

Reporters covering campaign events attended by Mr Biden since he emerged from COVID-19 lockdown and began wearing a face mask have remarked on the presence at close quarters to the presumptive presidential candidate of Jerry K Stirling (centre in main picture) .

Stirling, a ventriloquist and celebrity impersonator, has been the 3am house act at the MGM Grand Casino and Hotel on the Las Vegas strip for the past two decades.

While reporters could not secure an explanation for Stirling’s presence on the campaign trail they have noted a distinct lack of gaffes by Biden at news conference and in interviews since he emerged from social isolation.

PM rushed to hospital with back spasms

SYDNEY: Prime Minister Scott Morrison is recovering well in a private hospital in his federal electorate of Cook after being rushed there last night by ambulance with back spasms.

A rather embarrassed Mrs Jenny Morrison admitted the painful spasms came suddenly upon her husband not long after they had retired to bed for the night.

“I warned Scott not to try the position he was keen on but he was very, very stubborn and persuasive as we all know he can be.

“For some reason, he just got it in his head and was determined just for once to try lying straight in bed.”

Budget back in the black: Treasurer

CANBERRA: A beaming Josh Frydenberg has announced that the 2019-20 Budget is back in surplus after all.

The Treasurer told the Today show on Channel 9 that two new “accounting and administrative errors” had been discovered in the government’s original $130 billion Jobkeeper program that was found last week to only cost $70 billion.

“The first error Treasury uncovered late yesterday shaved a further $55 billion off the program’s cost and overnight the second major “error” adjusment has shown that #jobkeeper has actually made money – almost $15 billion in fact.”

“Because we gave the figures another crack, I’m proud to announce we are back on track and back in the black,” he said.

Loose lips prove costly

SYDNEY: Four witnesses at the opening days of the Royal Commission into National Natural Disaster Arrangements here have each been fined $2500 for contempt of the commission for using the words “climate change” during their evidence.

Premier’s re-election odds shorten

BRISBANE: Online bookies have slashed the odds of the state Labor government being returned to power in October following news that Newscorp will cease print editions of a large swag of regional titles mid year.

Mastheads to go digital only include the Mackay Mercury, Gladstone Observer, Rockhampton Morning Bulletin, Bundaberg News-Mail, Sunshine Coast Daily and the Queensland Times in Ipswich.

A Sportsbet spokesperson said: “With all these papers no longer able to spew out in print form an endless spiteful putdown of everything Annastacia Palaszczuk and her government has ever stood for, she’s now looking pretty good in our view.’

And other betting agencies have agreed, with most slashing the odds of Palaszczuk being returned for a third term as Premier to around 6-4 from the previous 3-1.