WASHINGTON: US President Donald Trump (main picture) says he has experienced no side-effects from consuming the controversial drug hydroxychloroquine, touted as a potential preventive measure against the potentially fatal COVID-19 virus.
Mr Trump said he believed there was no risk in him taking the anti-malarial drug as recommended to him by Vice-President Mike Pence.
“Mike’s a good guy,” Mr Trump said. “He is now almost as big an expert – no-one in the world knows more than I do – on the coronavirus and the various treatments available.
“He told me in no uncertain terms that taking chloroquine, which is a beautiful drug, is totally safe. Totally safe.
“His exact words to me were: ‘It’s totally safe for me.’ I’ve been taking chloroquine now for a few weeks and I’ve seen no side-effects whatsoever. None. Period.”
SYDNEY: The Australian Retailers Association has expressed relief that all those high-end fashion, footwear and gift shops on the first floors of mega shopping centres around the nation are reopening.
“It means shops that would have gone belly-up through lack of customers over recent months if COVID-19 hadn’t come along can now soldier on for some weeks before still closing for good.”
CANBERRA: Mental health authorities throughout the nation are predicting a big spike in mental illnesses and other serious psychotic conditions as more and more Australians hear the news that Australia post COVID-19 is slowly returning to normal.
WASHINGTON, USA: Senior Republican Party strategists here have whittled down to just a field of three the slogan the grand old party intends to use for President Donald Trump’s reelection bid in November.
It’s understood “Our Moron, Right or Wrong” is slightly favoured over “Don’t Dump on Trump” and “He’s a Blithering Idiot but He’s Our Blithering Idiot”.
CANBERRA: The Morrison government’s protocol officers have just released their preferred nomenclature for Mrs Jenny Morrison whenever she is out and about with her husband.
Media outlets have been requested to simply call her FLOTSAM which stands for First Lady Or the Spouse Alongside Morrison.