Motion splits impeachment inquiry

AMERICAN POLITICSMembers of the US House of Representatives’ inquiry into the possible impeachment of US President Donald Trump are split on whether the probe should be temporarily suspended.

Speaker of the House of Representatives Nancy Pelosi said a motion for an adjournment of the inquiry into President Trump’s dealings with the Ukraine government and other issues was unavoidable and should be supported by both Democrats and Republicans.

“We simply can’t continue with the inquiry right now,” Ms Pelosi said.

“The problem is the sheer amount of shit the US Ambassador to the European Union, Gordon Sondland, dumped on the President during his appearance at the inquiry (main picture).

“That quantity of shit is unprecedented. It means we need to adjourn so that Congressional staff can clean the inquiry chamber.

“That will take at least a week given the amount of shit needed to be shovelled off the tables and floor of the inquiry chamber.

“The stench is unbearable and the stain is going to be difficult, more likely impossible, to remove.

“Then there’s the vermin problem. The chamber has already been invaded by swarms of flies who can’t resist even small dollops of shit let alone the tsunami Ambassador Sondland let loose.

“The Democrats on the inquiry committee have all agreed to support an adjournment of the hearings until such time the chamber is once again fit to be occupied.

“But the Republican members are digging in and just won’t support the motion.

“They claim there is simply no shit whatsoever to be seen, despite the clear presence of mountains of steaming brown turds on the chamber floor.

“In fact they claim the chamber is sparkling clean and that they’ve never before seen a room in such a pristine state,” she said.