PM puts government on war footing

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Story supplied by News Corp reporters embedded with the Prime Minister

Australia’s courageous, level-headed and loyal Prime Minister, Scott Morrison, has issued a string of far-sighted national security and defence directives to handle the existential threat to Australia created by Bill Shorten and the Labor/Greens axis of treason that backed changes to medical evacuation laws for asylum seekers detained offshore.

In the face of the imminent invasion of Australia by hundreds and possibly thousands of rapists, murderers, and paedophiles thanks to the Labor/Greens traitors, Mr Morrison has correctly put his government on a war footing.

He has valiantly started by shifting the running of the federal government from Parliament House in Canberra to a top-secret Defence Department command centre located deep underground somewhere in the ACT (main picture above).

During the current invasion emergency and to evade any rapists, murderers, and paedophiles who arrive on Australian soil at the invitation of the Labor/Greens axis of malevolence, the Prime Minister has stopped using his CommCar-issued official vehicle, an armoured BMW saloon, in favour of a missile-proof Army tank (pictured).warroom car

He uses the new vehicle to travel to the bomb-proof bunker from where Mr Morrison and his safe pair of hands in troubled times has already issued a barrage of innovative and insightful orders to security and defence officials.

“I have moved swiftly to re-open the Christmas Island detention centre to house the thousands, maybe tens of thousands, of rapists, murderers, and paedophiles who will be on boats heading across the ocean as we speak to invade Australia,” Mr Morrison orated.

“The reckless Labor/Greens axis of malice has invited them here but I will do all I can to stop every one of them, although understandably one or two or maybe one in each state may just slip through the net and land in or near a couple of marginal seats before the election.”

Mr Morrison bravely declared other vital steps he would take in the wake of the Labor/Greens cowardly actions in parliament included re-opening as active Defence facilities with heavy artillery a number of historic sites including Pinchgut Island in Sydney Harbour, Fort Lytton near the mouth of the Brisbane River, and Leighton Battery at Fremantle.

“In addition I am ordering the re-establishment of the Word War II anti-submarine booms in Darwin Harbour just in case,” the Prime Minister churchilled.

A MESSAGE FROM THE EDITORS OF THE BUG:

This story has been provided to The Bug by News Corp Australia reporters, columnists, and commentators embedded with the Prime Minister Scott Morrison in his underground bomb-proof bunker and war rooms (pictured).

warroom embedsThe embedded reporters have provided the story in line with the usual standards required by News Corp of its journalists when covering the federal Coalition government.

The embedded reporters who, according to a Morrison Government spokesperson, were randomly selected from among all applicants from all media outlets but just happened to be drawn entirely from News Corp Australia, are coincidentally under the command of the head of News Corp International, Rupert Murdoch.

“I am thoroughly enjoying this new role,” Mr Murdoch said. “You know my old man was a wartime reporter and I always wanted to emulate him.

“Being in Canberra in February, or at any time really, is pretty much on par with suffering the privations of Egypt, Anzac Cove and other battlefields in the First World War so I can now relate better to what he went through.

“To give the embeds a better sense of wartime conditions I’ve invited my lovely latest wife Jerry to visit each day.

“She provides a sort of Vera Lynn presence and sings a few of Vera’s hits of The Blitz which all the reporters tell me they love whenever I ask them.”