The Oz adds no ads to ABC stoush

media dinkus thumbnailRupert Murdoch’s national newspaper The Australian says it is stepping up its campaign against the ABC by matching the national broadcaster’s “no advertising” policy.

“If we can’t attract and keep subscribers and readers with our usual templates of anti-Labor, anti-union, and anti-ABC stories, then it’s time we pulled out all stops,” a Newscorpse insider told The Bug.

“We have been implementing  a carefully structured and road-tested plan to bring the national broadcaster to its well-used knees and make it much easier for an incoming Morrison-Murdoch government to sell it off.

“In the old days whenever anyone set up a rival newspaper Rupert made sure it was swiftly closed down by drastically undercutting advertising rates in his own publications.

“Once the interlopers left the scene, our rates went back to where they were before. Mission accomplished.

“So now, when we are out to destroy the ABC because it offers media consumers namby-pamby things we don’t, like balance and facts, we have to adopt the same tactics.

“So we’re going full bore to having a completely advertising-free paper. That’ll show those lefty pinko, homosexual, cross-dressing, commos at the ABC.

“We’re almost there too. Take a look at Monday’s print edition of The Oz we published this week.

“It contained almost zero ads. In fact in 24 pages there was just slightly more than a total of a half-page of paid ads, and that included a quarter-page display ad from a company selling tours to Europe and just more than another quarter-page in total in public notices.

“Any others were our usual ads begging people to subscribe to the paper and flogging our own wine offers to readers. Maybe if they get pissed enough they might subscribe.

“Should we have been closed down long ago for having fuck-all ads? Of course we should have. And we would have been if The Oz wasn’t a vanity project of you-know-who in the Big Apple.

“Once he carks it, hopefully less-demented minds will prevail and The Oz will be shut down for having no ads – and that’s going to send a powerful message to the left-wing loonies running the national broadcaster now.

“No ads equals no future. Plain and simple,” the Newcorpse insider said.

The Bug asked whether the lack of ads simply reflected the fact The Australian and its coverage were not meeting the demands or needs of the market rather than a “carefully structured and road-tested plan”.

In reply the insider said: “Are you from the ABC?”