And, no, I’m not talking about when Gina Rinehart jumped into the pool at that fancy 12-star resort on the Mediterranean, with towel-girl Aunty Pauline at the ready.

The splash I’m about is what we in the once-noble craft of journalism call a newspaper’s front-page heading and this rant is based on a splash my colleagues over in our Mediocre Bytes mezzanine hub had fun with just the other day.

The whole yarn is linked below but here’s the guts of their pisstake of that SMH screamer! Here’s the one an alleged sub-editor used in the real The Sun-Herald the other day…

I’ll bet my useless, dried-up, leathery old balls that you BUGgers out there will know how incredibly stupid that heading is. Ed Husic’s Gaza motion was not shut down for party unity. That manoeuvre would have only inflamed already red-hot divisions within the ALP rank-and-file over how the Albanese government has handled that issue. My best bet is that a majority of ALP members nationwide would be rightly appalled by the genocide Bibi Netanyahu and his band of butchers have inflicted on the Gaza strip these past 34 months.

My MB colleagues then came up with a far more accurate splash….

A much better, far more accurate summary of Labor national conference events, I think you’ll all agree.

But I think it could have even more improved on, even if the Herald printing presses would have had to be modified. So, what do you think?