The column that has fun with the smaller mistakes and missteps of Australia’s mainstream mediocre; that pays homage to those sweet little fishes that individually don’t amount to a full meal but collectively can cause a tummy upset over the overall state of the once great and noble craft of journalism in this country.

Over the journey, Mediocre Bytes compilers have had a lot of fun with the rubbish Nine News Queensland presenter Melissa Downes has been forced to read out.

Like this example above. We can’t remember the crap she had to come out with for this one but trust us, it would have been pretty embarrassing but just last night (Friday) we spotted one that we thought was a …. what to you call them, Ned Ryerson?

Oh, that’s right! AN ABSOLUTE DOOZEY!

At around the 6.20pm ad break, poor Melissa said this about an upcoming segment: Candid confessions from the
Artemis crew: just how close they came to defying orders and flying all the way to the moon!

Wow! Why didn’t that lead the bulletin? Shirley a NASA space crew who defied mission control orders would never shuffle off this mortal coil ever again! And how the fuck did they defy orders “and fly all the way to the moon”? Isn’t that was they did?

At least reporter Mimi Becker after that ad break would reveal all about this almost mutiny!

Not one single word. Just the usual stuff about how close the astronauts came to one another during their amazing trip around the moon and if they’d had a landing capsule, they would have gotten down on the lunar surface and sampled the cheese.

So, just how close did Nine News Queensland come to being a professional news source with carefully selected words that looked professional and made sense with that pre-ad-break tease, a sort of click bait really?

Let’s answer that with one last look at our feature image.

ABSOLUTE FUCKING FICTION! And let’s pray it wasn’t written by some who thinks they are a journalist.

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From the ABC radio news at 8.30am this morning …. “Prime Minister Anthony Albanese has joined world leaders ….” OUCH! Couldn’t fit in the word “other” or is Albanese on the wrong side of politics for our modern national broadcaster?

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