WASHINGTON, DC: Quick thinking by US Secretary of State, Marco Rubio, is being credited with avoiding a potential global conflagration after President Donald Trump vowed revenge against the Norway-based Nobel Peace Prize Committee which failed to name him as this year’s winner of its internationally coveted accolade.

Venezuela’s opposition leader Maria Corina Machado was announced yesterday as the 2025 Peace Prize winner for promoting democratic rights in her country.

Ignoring the fact that he was ineligible for this year’s award, President Trump lashed out at the Nobel Committee, telling a cabinet meeting at the White House that as he spoke US Air Force (USAF) long-range B2 bombers were in the air on his orders to attack the committee’s Oslo headquarters.

“I’ve directed them to bomb and keep bombing the committee’s HQ until I get the prize I deserve for promoting peace,” he said.

“I thought stopping seven wars might have been enough to clinch it, but apparently it’s not enough for those woke, far-left Trump haters in New Orway.

“So on top of the bombing I also intend to restart those same seven wars. Let’s see how the committee likes it when the fighting and killing begins again between ….aaah…. Israel and Iranistan, or between Congaline and Cannolia, and between… aah… those other shithole nations and the other shittier ones.”

As President Trump spoke Mr Rubio quietly slipped out of the cabinet room and made a beeline for the nearby Oval Office where he roughly wrenched from its wall one of the large gaudy gold filigrees the President has had installed since he began his second term in January this year.

Returning to the cabinet meeting Mr Rubio announced “a surprise” for the President.

“It turns out you did get the Peace Prize and here it is,” Rubio said when placing the chunk of plaster with the filagree attached onto the cabinet table. (main picture)

President Trump then thanked Mr Rubio and the Nobel Committee and announced he would immediately direct the USAF B2s to change course and instead head for Chicago’s City Hall.

Want to be alerted immediately a new blog hits Australia’s longest running and most offensive satire site? Simply click on the Follow sign or the link below to be emailed new yarns the moment they are uploaded! The very second we go far too far – and trust us we will – you can then quickly unfollow via the three dots!

Follow The Bug Online on WordPress.com