Did anyone else reach for the chuck bucket when Morrison trotted out a new slogan while on the hustings in outback Queensland a few days back?
Dressed in professional-camera-ready country-style blue shirt, fawn jeans and R.M. Williams riding boots (at top) that warranted a snappy salute from an RAAF airman, the Father of the Nation and the man who single-handedly saved Australia from coronavirus catastrophe wore an Aussie flag face mask as a nod not just to the Cronulla beach rioters but bogans everywhere and appeared totally unfazed by the fact he’d forgotten to put on his girdle that morning.
He then told a little select group of rusted-on LNP voters and pollie nodding heads that he and his government would “back them in!”
Any idea what the hell that’s supposed to mean? No, me neither. Maybe it’s some sort of code that a whole semi-trailer load of pork barrels is heading their way and maybe the driver will have to “back them in”. Obscene amounts of public money for an aquatic centre upgrade or female changing rooms they haven’t applied for or if they did, failed to meet the criteria for funding.
Let’s add “Back them in” to the very helpful “I’ve got your back” he offered to Malcolm Turnbull.
Along with “If you want a job, you’ll get a job” and “If you have a go, you’ll get a go!”, the last two probably distilled in a happy clappy snappy way from Pentecostal prosperity doctrine.
It’s sometimes hard to keep up with all these slogans from the man who is “burning for us every single day”. And there was me thinking the rapture was a fairly spectacular, short-term, event rather than a drawn-out process lasting perhaps years.
And why is Morrison on the hustings in the first place? Because an election is looming. And why do we know this? Because when Channel 9 Sydney ran the story on Smoko’s outback sojourn, newsreader Georgie Gardner told us the trip had renewed speculation – probably by her mainly – of a 2021 election.
Reporter Fiona Willam backed Georgie up, talking of those very same rumours – maybe hers mainly – that a poll this year is on the cards.
And just to help out, the Nine news report then carried a series of photos showing Morrison chatting to Jacinda Ardern in his car and talking in a statesmanlike way to “other” world leaders back at his desk that night. Lovely photos, professionally taken, wonderfully lit.
Imagine having to pay for that kind of exposure at the start of a faux campaign?
Well, you could, but why bother when Nine Entertainment not only has your back but is clearly intent on backing you in.
Shameful waste of a political career
Now is a good time to reflect on a period in office where little was achieved and a time in power by a man who always knew he was destined for greatness was marred by almost total inaction on the few things he had vehemently declared he stood for.
A time of hubris and arrogance based on a belief that any room didn’t have the smartest person in it until he made his entrance.
The endless boasts of monetary wealth earned more by inheritance and some luck in running because of who he knew than any real business sense and economic savvy. A foolish notion he had the common touch and could stay in power as long as he liked.
A man noted for his eloquence and wit, most likely based on how easily he held sway in a room of his brown-nosing almost-peers, yet could sometimes bumble and mumble and stumbled away like the rest of us mere mortals when facing a microphone and a media pack, especially when he was being loose with the truth.
Anyway, with all these important changes taking place in Washington over recent days, enough about Malcolm Turnbull.