Musk rethinks Tesla job cuts

TECHNOLOGY:

US technology pioneer Elon Musk says he has had second thoughts about reducing the work force of his Tesla electric vehicle company.

Mr Musk recently announced plans to cut costs and make Tesla cars cheaper by shedding more than 3,000 of the California-based company’s 45,000 workers –  an announcement that saw the company’s share price fall by 11%.

“I soon realised that cutting 3,000 jobs was the wrong decision,” he said at a news conference announcing a new rocket design for his space exploration company SpaceX (main picture).

“I really need to sack all 45,000. That makes far more sense, man.

“Oh, and by the way, when I say ‘man’ I also mean ‘women’, I mean ‘woman’, man.”

Mr Musk explained he was sacking all Tesla workers and effectively shutting down the electric vehicle company.

“I was at home just having a smoke and realised all my companies are chasing different markets, but they are all related to transportation,” he explained.

“Tesla was electric vehicles to get from A to B, SpaceX is space travel, and the Boring Company is tunnelling under the clogged roads of big cities to make travel faster and easier.

“It’s obviously good business sense to use your strengths so now instead of having people buy a Tesla to get from A to B, they can just use one of my tunnels.

“I’ll be building way more of them in all major US cities, and I expect overseas cities will come knocking on my door too.”

When asked how people would use his tunnels without a vehicle, Mr Musk said the answer was simple.

“The Boring Company is already working on building a hyperloop that uses magnetic levitation to propel a vehicle through a tunnel,” he said.

musk maglev“All we need to do is substitute people for those vehicles. People will just need to wear our special mag-lev suits (pictured) and they can shoot through a tunnel.

“That way we really don’t need Teslas at all. I’m surprised it took me this long to realise that.”

Responding to questions about the technology’s viability, Mr Musk said the Boring Company had already designed a hyperloop that could send someone through a tunnel at  250 mph (400 kph).

“But we are developing technology that can double or triple that speed and we are very confident of doing just that very soon,” he said.

“The only thing we need to work out now is how to stop them at the other end.”