AUSTRALIAN OF THE YEAR:

The head of the judging panel for The Bug‘s prestigious Australian of the Year Award, Morrie Bezzle, says he can guarantee there will be no repeat of the chaos – nor the death and injury toll – that accompanied the ceremony in Brisbane last year where the trophy was presented to Israeli Prime Minister, Benjamin Netanyahu. (below)

Mr Bezzle, The Bug‘s finance and investment advice columnist, also revealed for the first time the “intolerable pressure” applied by the board overseeing the selection of the annual honour for Mr Netanyahu to be named a year ago as Australian  of the Year.

Speaking from the Arthur Gorrie Remand Centre near Ipswich where he is being held on a number of charges related to alleged offences against consumer laws, Mr Bezzle (below) said the person judged to be Australian of the Year for their achievements throughout 2025 would be revealed a week from today as usual on Australinvasion Day.

“I can assure The Bug reader that next week’s ceremony will be nowhere near as bloody or deadly as last year’s event when the Israel Defence Force (IDF) strafed and bombed both the awards venue, the Brisbane Convention and Entertainment Centre, as well as the nearby South Bank TAFE, the ABC’s state headquarters, the Queensland Cultural Centre, and the Queensland Children’s Hospital,” he said.

“The problem started when the board overseeing the awards was insistent that we name Mr Netanyahu as the winner, even though I and the other judges had great reservations about the move.

“But the board wouldn’t take no for an answer and said The Bug and its annual award would be viewed as being antisemitic if we didn’t give the gong to Mr Netanyahu. So unfortunately we caved.

“Then things turned very ugly when the Israeli PM decided to fly to Brisbane to collect the award in person. Of course all hell broke loose once the Australian Federal Police arrested him as an international war criminal who had committed genocide on a massive scale, (below) and the IDF sent in fighter-bombers to hit targets in and around Brisbane’s South Bank precinct which caused several hundred deaths and loads more injuries.

“I guess the saddest part was the IDF’s destruction of multiple floors of the Queensland Children’s Hospital and the resultant deaths which they later admitted weren’t really necessary since the hospital itself was never a target of interest – they just bombed it out of habit.

“The IDF extracted Mr Netanyahu and flew him back to Israel, with the Australian of the Year trophy I might add.

“Thankfully we now have a new board overseeing the awards so there’ll be no repeat of last year’s madness next Monday,” Mr Bezzle said.

Recipients of The Bug‘s Australian of the Year honour in recent years have included (clockwise from top left below) businessman turned politician, Clive Palmer, for services to the legacy newspaper advertising industry; National Party Senator, Bridget McKenzie, for innovative sports grants distribution; teenage environmental activist, Scomo Turdberg, for aiming to rid the world of fossil fuels such as coal by burning more of it; and News Crap Australia righter, James Morrow, for his creation of the comical, eponymous, imbecilic, far-right, character who regularly pretends to be an authoritative political analyst.

Former prime ministers have also featured as AOTY winners.

Tony Abbott received the honour from Mr Bezzle, who was on supervised prison leave at the time, (below) for his work in 2023 bringing Australians together by dividing them over the Voice to Parliament referendum.

In an unprecedented move the judging panel gave former prime minister Scott Morrison six Australian of the Year Awards for 2022 in recognition of the work he performed for the nation after secretly swearing himself into multiple ministries towards the end of his time in office. (below)

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