Ex-Qantas worker fears clawback

BUSINESS – EXCLUSIVE:

A former Qantas employee says she hopes the airline does not attempt to erode past separation payments made to her or other ex-employees to recoup the $90 million it needs to pay a court-imposed penalty.

Speaking exclusively to The Bug, Joyce Alan said she was now attempting to forge a career as a professional Irish dancer after previously attempting to forge a career as a competent and ethical senior Qantas employee. (main picture)

Ms Joyce declined to specify her previous role at Qantas but said she left the airline with a “pathetically small payout”.

“Oi spent 15 years at Qawntus and day paid me joost $125 mullion in dat toim,” she said.

“Oi left da airloin with a pathetically small golden handshake after day cut moi $21.4 mullion payout boi more dan $9 mullion.

“So Oi hope dat Qawntus don’t troy sumting similar by troying ta get people loik me to fund da $90 mullion foin imposed boi da Federal Court of Australia.

“Oi tink dat would be unfair. Oi tink da $90 mullion foin is unfair too. After all, all da airloin did was sack illegally 1,820 baggage handlers under da guise of da COVID pandemic.

“Who’d have tort dat dat was illegal? Oi certainly didn’t. Oi tort it made good business sense,  udderwise how could Oi have been paid almost $10 mullion a year when Oi was at da airloin?”

Ms Alan spoke to The Bug exclusively on one condition.

“Oi don’t want ya presenting moi comments in some sorta fake Oirish accent which is joost insoolting if not racist,” she said.

Want to be alerted immediately a new blog hits Australia’s longest running and most offensive satire site? Simply click on the Follow sign or the link below to be emailed new yarns the moment they are uploaded! The very second we go far too far – and trust us we will – you can then quickly unfollow via the three dots!

Follow The Bug Online on WordPress.com