EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW:

Former prime minister Scott Morrison says he has received “rock solid” documentary evidence to back his view that his successor, Anthony Albanese, is on the wrong track when it comes to managing Australia’s relationship with China. Mr Morrison (main picture) outlined his stand in an exclusive one-on-one interview with The Bug.

The Bug: Thanks for your time. Can we start by having you summarise your views on just how the current PM is handling our relationship with China?

Scott Morrison: Very, very badly. As I’ve said, China’s leader Xi Pingjin….

The Bug: Xi Jinping.

Scott Morrison: … is charming and flattering Anthony Albanese just to get what he wants. But he has a very narrow, self-centred view of the world – brutal really. He’s a bully with no respect for democracy, rules like a tyrant, and wants to dominate the world both in trade and militarily.  

The Bug: This is Xi Jinping? Not Donald Trump?

Scott Morrison: I’m talking about Ji Pingpong.

The Bug: Xi Jinping.

Scott Morrison: Anthony Albanese is being too soft. Unlike me when I was PM.

The Bug: You mean like when you sparked the half-decade deep freeze in Australia-China relations and export bans on Australian goods by doing the first Donald Trump administration’s bidding by allowing your foreign minister Marise Payne to make inflammatory comments about the source of the COVID virus – a deep freeze that has only thawed under the Albanese Government? Or like your record as PM in ignoring South Pacific nations, allowing China to move in diplomatically speaking and curry favour with small nation leaders in the region? Or the constant drum beat of war we heard throughout your term in office from people like Peter Dutton who was forever stoking anti-China sentiment to score cheap political points?

Scott Morrison: Sorry, I’m having a bit of trouble hearing you.

The Bug: Let’s move on. Is your view supported by your colleagues in the Liberal Party?

Scott Morrison: Well, I know for sure that at least five former ministers in my government back me to the hilt on this issue.

The Bug: Can you name those five?

Scott Morrison: Well, I won’t name names but I can tell you they were the federal treasurer, the finance minister, minister for health, the minister for home affairs, and the industry, science, energy and resources minister.

The Bug: Anyone else backing your view?

Scott Morrison: Well, I have rock solid documentary evidence that I’m on the right… I mean Right track.

The Bug: Really?

Scott Morrison: Yes, I draw your attention to the front page of The Weekend Australian. (below) Which quotes a well-known China expert expressing the same views as me.

The Bug: You mean they’ve quoted you?  

Scott Morrison: As I say, documentary proof.

The Bug: Well, that same News Crap Australia story criticises Albanese – nothing new there – for not explicitly saying he trusts Xi Jinping. So it’s only fair to ask you. Do you trust Xi Jinping?

Scott Morrison: Sorry, I didn’t catch that. Could you repeat the question?

The Bug: Certainly. Do you trust Xi Jinping?

Scott Morrison:  Sorry, you’re breaking up, I can’t make out what you’re saying. If you can hear me, I’m afraid I’ll have to end this now. Bye.

The Bug: But we’re doing this interview face to face. I’m sitting right opposite you in the same room.

(Scott Morrison exists the room, eyes closed, holding one hand skyward and speaking in tongues)   

The Bug: Thanks for your time. I guess.

Scott Morrison:  Heufh fggt sdket yererw dggfre…

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