

WASHINGTON DC: The Pentagon has released details of two newly struck medals to be awarded to US President Donald Trump at the huge military parade being held in Washington DC this weekend.
The parade is designed to mark the 250th anniversary of the formation of the United States Army but also falls on the President’s 79th birthday.
The new medals include a special Grossly Distended Heart (at left in main picture) which the Pentagon explained was a one-off version of the Purple Heart (at right in main picture) traditionally awarded to troops injured in battle.
“The President said he deserved such a medal after being shot during the 2024 election campaign,” a Pentagon spokesperson said.
“So we’ve struck a special medal just for him for his bravery in the face of enemy fire, as well as a new medal, the Order of the Bone Spurs, (below) recognising the President’s personal record of military service.”

Mr Trump, speaking at the White House where he signed an executive order formally declaring 14 June as his 59th birthday, said he was pleased to receive the medals.
“Nobody deserves them more than me, certainly not the suckers and losers who usually get these things simply for dying in battle,” he said.
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MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA: The share price of global technology company Google Inc is in freefall this morning following news it had appointed a new head of its artificial intelligence (AI) division.
The company has announced that Koray Kavukcuoglu, currently Google DeepMind’s chief technology officer, would assume the new role of its Chief AI Architect. (below)

The news saw Google’s share price drop markedly with Wall Street traders offering a simple explanation.
“Why wouldn’t Google hand that new job to AI itself?” said one stockbroker shortly before dumping a few million Google shares.
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MELBOURNE: Monash IVF has been embarrassed with news breaking of another embryo-mix-up bungle here, with more executive heads expected to roll at the fertility clinic operator after the resignation yesterday of the company’s chief executive officer.


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