Only three sleeps to go until polling day. Although it seems half the country has already voted and maybe by Saturday there’ll be nobody turning up to polling booths and a million sausages will have to go to landfill. Regardless, our political experts here at The Bug will soldier on and continue delivering the most comprehensive campaign coverage in Australia.

Australian Federal Police last night arrested senior ABC “reporter” David Speers in Canberra and charged him with fraud.

A Federal Police spokesperson said the arrest (main picture) followed hundreds of complaints lodged by viewers of ABC News with both the national broadcaster and the AFP about the nightly election campaign reports delivered by Speers.

“The gist of the complaints is that Speers is introduced each night as offering ‘analysis’ of the election campaign events of that day, but in reality he just parrots or summarises what viewers have already seen and heard in earlier reports in the news bulletin,” the spokesperson said.

“Many viewers also complained that it is always quite obvious that Speers is filing his report from Parliament House in Canberra, while the summary he delivers is based on the hard work of other journalists who have been on the punishing and high-pressure campaign trail following party leaders around the country.

“We believe it’s a cut-and-dried case of fraud for Speers to present himself as delivering something original each night when in fact all complainants said he adds absolutely zero to their sum total of political knowledge. They know just as much when he ends his reports as they did at the start of them.”

The spokesperson said Speers spent last night in the Canberra watchhouse and would appear for mention in the local Magistrate’s Court today.

“He is likely to gain bail but we will be arguing that he needs to stay off the air until after any trial, and certainly until after Saturdays election,” the spokesperson said.

The AFP was also considering charging the ABC itself over Speers’s role at the national broadcaster.

“We have noted that the ABC continues to refer to Speers as its ‘national political lead’,” the spokesperson said.

“We’re yet to work out what the fuck that means. He certainly isn’t leading anyone towards any novel insights into national politics.

“So the ABC may yet face charges of misrepresentation under consumer law. We’re yet to decide on that.”

***

A briefing on the Labor Party’s costings of its election promises was cut short yesterday.

Treasurer Jim Chalmers and Finance Minister, Senator Katy Gallagher, outlined funding sources for its commitments including an extra $6.4 billion in previously unidentified savings.

At the news conference in Canberra, Mr Chalmers restated his claims that the Albanese Government had managed the nation’s economy and finances well in its first term and was better placed than the Coalition to continue growing the economy while responsibly managing government spending.

However, the briefing ended abruptly after Mr Chalmers was asked a question about the explanatory notes supplied to reporters.

The question related to a footnote that appeared in three-point font buried in the middle of the 240-page background notes which suggested a returned Labor Government may need to consider shedding 41,000 public service jobs and abolishing work-from-home arrangements to meet its budget targets.

Mr Chalmers and Senator Gallagher had differing response to the question.

“Did anyone say KFC?” Mr Chalmers said while packing up his speaking notes and rapidly exiting the room.

By contrast Senator Gallagher pointed to the back of the room and yelled “Fire!” before also exiting the room while the attention of reporters was temporarily diverted.

***

Lord Downer of Adelaide Hills (below) spent yesterday on a hunger strike to draw attention to his campaign to have his daughter the Countess Lady Georgina Downer take up a seat in the Federal Parliament after Saturday’s election.

Speaking to reporters at his family seat Pout House, His Lordship said Lady Georgina’s appearance on ABC TV’s Q&A program on Monday night (below) in which she proffered “wise and independent views” on a range of issues proved that she would be an invaluable addition to the nation’s parliament.

“It is outrageous that my dear darling daughter is expected to ‘campaign’ for so-called ‘pre-selection’ and then put her future in the hands of the riff raff otherwise known as ‘voters’ at an ‘election’,” Lord Downer said.

“Surely there would be no objection to her being appointed to a seat. After all there are 150 of them and surely one could be reserved for someone of her ilk and breeding,” he said.

His Lordship prematurely ended his address to reporters saying he felt weakened after the first hour of his hunger strike.

“I shall be taking early tiffin before resuming my protest so that I should have sufficient energy to last until a luncheon of cold meats which should see me through to supper,” he said.

***

Supposedly the final SMH/The Age Resolve poll before Saturday lobbed overnight, and declared a 53/47 two-party lead to Labor, compared with 52/48 the time before.

All this means that the average of the polls we are now monitoring is now 52.7/47.3 two-party preferred in Labor’s favour.

***

Some movement again on the betting front with Sportsbet widening the gap again after Monday’s substantial drop in the LNP’s odds that for a wee while gave 90 per cent of our mainstream mediocre some hope.

The first figures are from around 9.35 pm last night (Tuesday) with the results from roughly 24 hours earlier in brackets.

Sportsbet: Labor $1.13 ($1.21); Coalition $5.80 ($4.45)
Ladbrokes: Labor $1.16 ($1.16); Coalition $5.50 ($5.00)
TAB: Labor $1.15 ($1.16); Coalition $5.50 ($5.00)
bet365: Labor $1.16 ($1.18) Coalition $5.00 ($5.00).
Neds: Labor $1.16 ($1.16); Coalition $5.00 ($5.00).

UPDATE: Early on Wednesday, Sportsbet blew out the LNP’s odds to first $7 and then $8! Proving fools and no just Clive Palmer are soon parted from their money, some punters clearly thought these odds were worth a heart flutter and just as this post was about to be uploaded, Sportsbet had the Opposition back at $6.50.

***

Who would have thought this campaign would have lasted long enough for Peter Dutton to circle back on groups he has already alienated. Take it away, Matt Burke.

Memo subs: We’re running late in uploading today’s poll review so we need help identifying this Sky LNPNews “host”. (insert name) should at least be grateful that there now appears no hope at all of Dutton being grilled at the National Press Club.

BREAKING OVERNIGHT: In a desperate bid to get himself back in the electoral race, Peter Dutton has reportedly changed his name by deed poll to Pmurt Dlanod, cleverly keeping his initials but showing he’s now the exact opposite of you know who!

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