…and it’ll probably keep growing!

Anyone else out there in BUGland puzzled by how much of our daily news cycles are constantly dominated by issues that seem so terribly important but whose projected or much-touted outcomes are never, ever, going to happen?

Here are just a few.

AUKUS subs.
Never Gonna Happen.

We’ll have to get some new subs from somewhere once the last of our Collins unclassy vessels conks out, but it won’t have an AUKUS brand on it. AUKUS is dead in the water (sorry!) and it’s not just US defence officials predicting that.

The Yanks will have enough trouble building enough new nuclear subs for their own needs, yet alone be in the position to flog us a butcher’s handful of second hand Virginia-class subs that might one day be surplus to their requirements.

And yet we’ve already paid the Yanks close to a billion Aussie bucks to do what? Improve their ship-building yards’ capacity to keep the AUKUS nightmare alive.

Unbelievable, right? Only The Crook from Cook, The Liar from the Shire, could have originally inked this bullshit deal with the US and Britain. Only a gutless, scaredy-cat Labor government could have continued with this folly so they couldn’t be wedged on national insecurity.

And let’s not all get started on the loss of our sovereignty that AUKUS represents. And that the whole, stupid reasoning behind AUKUS was that we’d have fast, silent, subs that can stay detected under water for longer and get right up the arse of Xi Jinping and show him who’s boss. Good luck with that.

In the time it took to type that last par, my best guess is that another Chinese nuclear sub has slipped from the shipyard rails. My second best guess is that if a solid, dependable poll was conducted right now, Australians would be strongly in favour of scrapping AUKUS and not just because the Tangarine Shitgibbon in the White House is dismantling the world order and telling former strong allies whom he now sees as enemies that they’re now on their own.

We’ll get some subs one day that won’t send us broke and will keep us in charge of our own destiny.

Conventionally-powered subs – French maybe? – to putter around the Pacific where they belong?
It will probably take China a week or so to blow them out from under the water. AUKUS subs? Probably a few days more, and a bit closer to China.

For the admirals, current and retired, who cooked up this disgusting mess, we can still give them some AUKUS models; something else to play with in their baths.

AUKUS subs.
Never Gonna Happen.

A two-state solution in Israel.
Never Gonna Happen.

Now that Israel has resumed its genocide in Gaza – it took a little longer than many expected! – there’s no doubt all those countries – well over 100 of them – calling for a two-state solution, including Australia, will continue to argue for that state of repairs although it’s got less chance of happening than Peter Dutton coming out with some real, saleable policies over the next few months or Angus Taylor not shitting himself whenever he hears talk of election debates with Jim Chalmers.

Accused war criminal Benjamin Netanyahu and his Cabinet of child killers have made it clear a two-state solution is never going to happen. The job of removing Palestinians from Gazza – in whole or in parts – has resumed in earnest. Those in the West Bank will continue to be pushed east. Let’s hope they can swim.

Most of the western would will stay mute to Israel’s genocide, and our Penny Wong will continue be too far away to see what’s really happening over there.

Donald Trump will continue to give Netanyahu all the bombs he needs in preparation for turning Gaza into the Riviera of the East, The Jew’l in the Crown, or the seven-star Trumpopia tourist mecca Yam Tits prefers.

A two-state solution in Israel.
Never Gonna Happen.

Don Gordon-Brown

TO BE CONTINUED:

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